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The Ball of Ballinor Lyrics by Bedlam Bards

Take Out the Trash

0

Four and twenty virgins came down from Inverness
When the ball was over, there were four and twenty less
Chorus
Balls to your partner, Arse against the wall
If you canna get \ on a Saturday night
You canna get \ at all
The bride was in the bedroom, a talking to the groom
The front! the front!! And not the back's the entrance to the womb
Chorus
The queen was in the parlor, eatin' bread and honey
The king was in the chambermaid, and she was in the money!
Chorus
The deacon's wife, well she was there, with her butt against the wall
Put your money on the counter boys, I'm gonna convert you all
Chorus
There was \\ in the kitchen and \\ on the stones
Ya' couldna hear the music for the \\ and the groans
Chorus
The village butcher he was there, a cleaver in his hand
And every time he turned around, he circumcised the band
Chorus
The village blacksmith, he was there, his balls were made of brass
And when they clacked together, lightning shot out from his ass
Chorus
Cedric the Fiddler, he was there, 'tis true I tell you so
He entertained the ladies while he rosined up his bow
Chorus
Hawke the Balladeer was there, drunken as a lout
Strummin' on his instrument to see what would cum out
Chorus
The village chandler, he was there, filling in the cracks
His hand was in the honey comb, his wick was in the wax
Chorus
Some horny Vikings they were there, along with Eric the Red
They wore their horns inside their pants, instead of on their heads
Chorus
The Clan MacRaven, they were there, all around the keep
They ate up all the haggis, and they buggered all the sheep
Chorus
The letter carrier he was there, the poor man had the pox
He couldna \ the lassies, so he \ the letter box
Chorus
The village cripple, he was there, I did not like him much
He lined them up against the wall, and \\ with his crutch
Chorus
The village drunkard, he was there, boisterous and loud
He was swinging from the chandelier and whizzin' on the crowd
Chorus
The village idiot he was there, can you imagine that?
Amusing himself by abusing himself and catchin' it in his hat
Chorus
The village \\ she was there, she \\ \ \\
And every time she \ \\, \ \\ closed the door
Chorus
When the ball was over, everyone confessed
The music was exquisite, but the f**kin' was the best
Chorus
Chorus
Credits
Bedlam Bards

Bedlam Bards

About “The Ball of Ballinor” by Bedlam Bards

Read the complete lyrics to "The Ball of Ballinor" by Bedlam Bards from the album "Take Out the Trash". On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Pop.

"The Ball of Ballinor" is performed by Bedlam Bards. from the album "Take Out the Trash" This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "The Ball of Ballinor", explore more songs by Bedlam Bards using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"The Ball of Ballinor" is credited to Bedlam Bards. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"The Ball of Ballinor" appears on "Take Out the Trash".

Visit the Bedlam Bards artist page at /artist/bedlam-bards for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.