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Don’t Go Near the Eskimos Lyrics by Ben Colder

Spoofing The Big Ones!

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[Chorus]
Oop shoop moogi mushy doggy, oh
Oop shoop moogi ay
Means son, don't go near the Eskimos
Please do what I say
My daddy was working
For the weather station
A little bit North of Nome
And I grew up in that frozen country
Where the nights are six months long
I used to play like I was an Eskimo
I put whale oil on my hair
And every night I would beg my folks
Let me sleep in the frigid air
I was seventeen and my voice was changing
But the girls didn't thrill me none
'Cause I longed to go see an Eskimo
On the banks of the old Yukon
One night I slipped from my daddy's house
A little bit north of Nome
I knew that I could get back by morning
'Cause the nights are six months long
And there she was
Sitting on a chunk of ice
Eating a frozen fish
And dipping her friskies
In whale blubbe
And I said, ooga shooga mooshka
Which means the love in my heart
Is a burning
And she said, ooga mooshka nooshka
And that means, back up, buddy
You're melting the ice
I went back home and I told my daddy
About this maiden fair
And how I felt I'd love to melt
Them icicles in her hair
Dad's trembling lips turned purple
And his breath began to freeze
It was then he told me
I could never rub noses
With pretty little Um Shog Nee
He said, son, when you were born
Well, the Eskimo and the white man
Were having a lot of wild parties, see
The Eskimos always brought the ice
Well, they's having a lot of fun, you see
So one night, this Eskimo named Pie Eye
That's right, son, a pie-eyed Eskimo
He stole my little boy and made
A icicle out of him
So I stole you to get even
I was gonna make a
Fudgesicle out of you
But I loved you like you's my very own
And I treated you just, you know
Just like the cold blooded
Little Eskimo that you are
So you see, son, you can never
Rub noses with Um Shog Nee no more
Because, excuse me, see, Um Shog Nee
Has the coldest nose in Alaska
And that's why I've always say
[repeat Chorus]
Credits
Ben Colder

Ben Colder

About “Don’t Go Near the Eskimos” by Ben Colder

Read the complete lyrics to "Don’t Go Near the Eskimos" by Ben Colder from the album "Spoofing The Big Ones!". On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Comedy, Country.

"Don’t Go Near the Eskimos" is performed by Ben Colder. from the album "Spoofing The Big Ones!" This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Don’t Go Near the Eskimos", explore more songs by Ben Colder using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Don’t Go Near the Eskimos" is credited to Ben Colder. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Don’t Go Near the Eskimos" appears on "Spoofing The Big Ones!".

Visit the Ben Colder artist page at /artist/ben-colder for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.