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Performer Lyrics by Benjamin Lerner

2020

[Verse:]
I’m a performer – the world is a stage
Every conversation I have, every word that I say
Pre-rehearsed inside my mind, while I purposefully try
To get approval from outside It’s an absurd little game
I was conditioned from a young age to performing on command
So I’m always trying to prove that I’m way smarter than I am
When I was barely speaking words and counting on my hands
My father taught me concepts that were hard to understand
I wanted to be seen as someone special and unusual
The steps I missed in my mental development were crucial
When I was in my adolescence feeling free and youthful
I had to go to dinner parties I was introduced to
Lots of aging hippie baby boomers chewing Metamucil
Who were five times older than I was and if I’m being truthful
I was scared. Intimidated. But while disintegrating
On the inside, outside my eloquence was scintillating
But I was only recycling concepts and imitating
Other people I had listened to who gave me inspiration
I learned to be a mimic, a cynic, a critic
An actor, a faker, a parrot, a gimmick
People told me I was smart, which made me arrogant and giddy
But inside I still felt empty, sad, and terrible and shitty
And when I started winning some piano competitions
My family started pressuring, vicariously living
I was performing more ways than one and spinning
Out of control my mental health deteriorated quickly
And I was under pressure and performing every minute
Played the role of tortured prodigy, and I got lost within it
And long before I ever had a drink, I was addicted
To the rush I got from knowing people thought that I was gifted
And growing up with Asperger’s, the social isolation
Made me use my set of acting skills when I was tired of waiting
As a spectator on the side. I used to perform with pride
Studied social customs. Then abandoned all of mine
Learned to play a bunch of roles and switch up all the time
This created identity split and blurred distorted lines
I didn’t even remember who I was inside
That’s the consequence when you’re performing all the fuckin’ time
I was playing different characters to run and hide
Dealing with emotions hot and cold, winter summertime
Pressure makes diamonds, but makes you lose your mind as well
I was a barely formed child trying to find himself
I was broken inside with a shiny shell
Hid behind a beaming smile stuck inside a private hell
Credits
Benjamin Lerner

Benjamin Lerner

About “Performer” by Benjamin Lerner

Read the complete lyrics to "Performer" by Benjamin Lerner in 2020. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Rap.

"Performer" is performed by Benjamin Lerner. in 2020 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Performer", explore more songs by Benjamin Lerner using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

View all songs and biography for Benjamin Lerner · Trending lyrics · Billboard Hot 100

Frequently asked questions

"Performer" is credited to Benjamin Lerner. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

Album information for "Performer" is not available in our database yet. You can still read the full lyrics on this page.

Visit the Benjamin Lerner artist page at /artist/benjamin-lerner for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.

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