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Alcohol or Comedy Lyrics by Bif Naked

Okenspay Ordway I. (a.k.a. Things I Forgot to Tell Mommy)

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My life was Comedy. Quitting drinking was the easiest thing I've ever done. I have never looked back. I simply cannot understand why the hell I waited so long! Unmanageable life--what an embarrassment! What a weakness. What an ultimate lack of self-discipline. What a loser. My parents never drank or smoked, and I put them through hell. My poor parents. I was such an ungrateful, disrespectful, selfish, hormonal little teenager with a mouthy attitude and sense of humour quite unlike my sister's. I decided I didn't need to continue attending church with my parents. I was searching for my "individuality". What an idiot
I wanted attention. I wanted everyone to think I was funny. I wanted everyone to like me. I, I hated myself. I was called Bug Eyes. I was called Fish Lips. And, I was called Modern Dairies. The grade 9 girls hated me. They harassed me and beat me up. I wonder if they're living exciting, fulfilling loving lives. I wonder if they're happy and healthy. Me and my best friend Karine had every line of every Eddie Murphy movie down. "Goonay goo goo" "you can smell it" "I'm a karate man." "Karate man bruise on inside. Just don't show othe weakness." "Banana in the tailpipe." "Babulay Babulay bahaha. Babulay babulay ba ha." You name it. I wanted to be Eddie Murphy
Or, or Robin Williams. I wanted to be them. I still am enraptured with comedians. They must always be carefree and laughing and playing jokes and having fun. Except for maybe Richard Lewis. He always says he can't get a date. Betcha he can. Betcha he's really ticklish, like me. Tickled with life, tickled pink. Pink laaadies. Black Russians. Iron butterflies
Quitting drinking was the easiest thing I've ever done
Quitting my comedic dreams was hard. I can never look back on either
Credits
Bif Naked

Bif Naked

About “Alcohol or Comedy” by Bif Naked

Read the complete lyrics to "Alcohol or Comedy" by Bif Naked from the album "Okenspay Ordway I. (a.k.a. Things I Forgot to Tell Mommy)". On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Pop.

"Alcohol or Comedy" is performed by Bif Naked. from the album "Okenspay Ordway I. (a.k.a. Things I Forgot to Tell Mommy)" This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Alcohol or Comedy", explore more songs by Bif Naked using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Alcohol or Comedy" is credited to Bif Naked. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Alcohol or Comedy" appears on "Okenspay Ordway I. (a.k.a. Things I Forgot to Tell Mommy)".

Visit the Bif Naked artist page at /artist/bif-naked for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.