[Intro]
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Oh, oh, oh
[Chorus]
I spend my days thinking about
Oh, tell me baby, is it all my fault?
I wanna open up with you
I thought we'd do service side-by-side
I know you feel something inside
Oh, can I not even get one word?
Am I losing myself, losing myself
If I say that I'm waiting up on you?
[Verse 1]
I’m still on this day-to-day
Thinking about the things that have gone and left
The moments that won’t come back to me
I wonder what this is for, this loss I feel
Heard many times and you know I thought you were
But to be honest, I think it’ll be difficult to replicate
What you’ve meant to me
You’ve been through a lot. I think you allowed some peace
I’ll never understand why it needs to be like this
I could go all day about what doesn’t make sense
But nothing really does. I don’t know how time should be better spent
But I do wonder if we'll ever meet again
On different terms, with different lives
Maybe still have butterflies, our eyes scared to meet
Because all of a sudden we understand how much time we wasted
Just to get back here
Maybe we walk a bit, find a hidden gem
Catch up on where we've been, how we used to be, how we used to live
Our bodies timid, our eyes are still
Because we know this moment is all we got
I know at times it's hard to express yourself
I would’ve understood in that moment
Emotions high, that one might’ve misspoken
We both witnessed our loved ones make mistakes
What makes this any different?
Because there’s something you ain’t saying
Something you won't admit
I wouldn’t have seen you as any less
How much of what we say is calculated, attached to an agenda?
All I know is everything I’ve ever said
The things I want, how you make me feel, is what I thought to be true
So please, no more long-form explanations
Because in the end, you just avoid what you feel
Ever since I was young, I’ve had a clear memory
I used to call out Aunties for being bad mothers
I remember what’s been done and what’s been said like an auditor
How I pull receipts, lay what's known but won’t say themselves
It's like I know them more than they know themselves
From Outlet to now, I’ve been on that because
I can’t let nobody control no narrative
Because in hindsight, I would never talk to no kid like that
And I thought that’s what we agreed on
That summer on the block, when you saw that boy
How you smiled, how you looked at me
And you act like I never notice nothing
I bring this up because I got a feeling you’ve kept my things
And from your word, that action doesn’t make sense to me
But all this time, wandering from place to place
All those moments that you've brought along
I guess some habits are hard to break
Don’t know which I prefer: let me go or keep me round
Like that smarties pack
I can’t even lie, I got curious fingers
I went through some notebooks, I found some things
It made me think, but it never bothered me
You've had such a hard life and I can’t be mad at that
You could also say that I just believed in us
If you hear this part, if you’re mad at that, write me another letter
I really don’t give a fuck
Now, who the bitch that told you I got bitches
Just because Lord gave a jaw like this, and I make some raps
You think I move like that?
Aye, man this album is way too heavy
I can make a joke, shouldn’t beat a dead horse
But when did I become so eloquent? Man, it's nice being intelligent
Aye, my Pops thinks it's an age difference
That you commitment kids, and I’m just not ready
This is the closest we'll probably ever be
But sometimes it don’t matter how many bridges are built
From the same tree, from the same root
The outcome is still that we're just different men
See, I know him too well, if he knew the truth
He would have turned on you
Just like you, he would’ve said things that he can’t take back
It’s not his fault we're all conditioned
To have different views, live different lives
Time don’t ever stop and is precious ever
But when the day does recline, as they close up shop and head on home
I wish I could sing the same tune
That’s when my mind rewinds, and I whisper your name as if you were still here
Funny, they always asked what I rap about
And then when I talk like this, they just look away
I don’t know what this world wants from me
But I know that I’ve done enough
And I need you to know that you’ve done the same
That it don’t matter how we measure this life with titles, accolades, and likes
That you are, that you’ve always been enough
[Chorus]
I spend my days thinking about
Oh, tell me baby, is it all my fault?
I wanna open up with you
I thought we'd do service side-by-side
I know you feel something inside
Oh, can I not even get one word?
Am I losing myself, losing myself
If I say that I'm waiting up on you?
