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A Cake for Bertie’s Party (Rotten Shed) Lyrics by Cardiacs

Some Fairytales From The Rotten Shed

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[Unintelligible back-and-forths between Kavus and Babba run throughout the song]
[Tim, pre-song and during intro]
Put your guitar on!
Carry on.
What are you doing?
Jim? Jim!
[Verse 1 - Tim Smith, Bob Leith, Kavus Torabi]
Rip open packets and read before using
Up- to- the- stabby, your sanity losing, or something
(Oh fucking hell!) (Come on!)
Hide stabby thing in your hand, it’s amusing
You stab and your sick Uncle Bimbo all oozing
[Chorus]
Everyone’s looking and everyone’s trying their best to see over the top of me
Over and under the weight of the world is too much because everyone laughs at me
[Instrumental - Tim Smith, Kavus Torabi]
(Did a bit with the volume control there... [?])
(Now!)
(Now!)
[Verse 2]
Cut me, I’m bleeding, my artery's severed
Plеase lock me up, don’t you know I desеrve it?
My mummy told me that nurses are smashing
But Babba's an arsehole, he needs a good thrashing!
Twat!
[Chorus]
Everyone’s looking and everyone’s trying their best to see over the top of me
Over and under the weight of the world is too much because everyone laughs at... Jim
[Song ends abruptly; post-song]
Kavus: Leave it alone- he keeps fucking up the frequency of the guitar! -but we slow down, th- 'cos it's up there with the 't-t-t', and-
Tim: The what?
Kavus: -just disables it on the g-string.
Tim: The what?
Kavus: But there i- the, this, 'cos you can hear it when the frequencies-
Babba: [?]
Tim: Shut him up! Shut him up!
Kavus: But- Tim! You s- you were the-
Tim: SHUT HIM UP!
Kavus: You were the one that said it...
[Fade out]
Credits
Cardiacs

Cardiacs

About “A Cake for Bertie’s Party (Rotten Shed)” by Cardiacs

Read the complete lyrics to "A Cake for Bertie’s Party (Rotten Shed)" by Cardiacs from the album "Some Fairytales From The Rotten Shed". On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Non-Music.

"A Cake for Bertie’s Party (Rotten Shed)" is performed by Cardiacs. from the album "Some Fairytales From The Rotten Shed" This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "A Cake for Bertie’s Party (Rotten Shed)", explore more songs by Cardiacs using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"A Cake for Bertie’s Party (Rotten Shed)" is credited to Cardiacs. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"A Cake for Bertie’s Party (Rotten Shed)" appears on "Some Fairytales From The Rotten Shed".

Visit the Cardiacs artist page at /artist/cardiacs for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.