[Intro]
Huh, I'm glad we came in here
Yeah, you-- you wanna sit on the bed?
Cool
Um, yeah
So, you can do whatever you want
I mean, whatever you're comfortable with
Whatever, okay
Yeah, I'll lay down
[Verse 1]
Finally we got a live one
Put some liquor in her cup
Tuck her up, time to get some
Patiently waiting to get up inside it
I'm trying to hide it but I'm so fucking excited
I'm really drunk but I don't care
I've been getting blue balls for the past year
Baby doll's looking right and she wanna bite
Likе Mike Tyson, sweet like a cake
And I'm gonna lick hеr icing, she like me
I can tell 'cause she's in her underwear
Telling me she wish that we'd go to a hotel
But I guess her friend's room gonna have to do
Especially since Randy threw up in that bathroom
Now I'm in the back room going up her dress
With my hand on her neck and my mouth on her left breast
Yes, I'm the man 'cause I make girls horny
You can ask me about it in the morning
Listen to me, slow your roll
Don't fuck girls you hardly know
(No, shut up, punk!)
You're always trying to mess this thing up for me
Every time I get a new girl to bang, you got something to say
I got this girl drunk and like everything
Yo, dude, you better listen to me
I'm the one who's looking out for you, G
I'm the one who's got your back
We're the ones who have to worry about the aftermath
What aftermath? There's nothing to worry about
This girl looks clean, no sores around her mouth
And I'm about to get this
We're about to miss our chance to get our dick licked
Dude, we saw her with like two other guys before
Obviously, she got bored, and now she wanna mess with us
Why you trying to stop us from busting a nut?
I don't think you really understand what's up
Dude, we're about to get fucked
[Chorus]
I'm two brains about this girl
Two things about this world
You got to know when to step on and when to step off (Yeah, come on)
Two brains about this girl
Two things about this world
You got to know when to step on and when to step off
(Ugh)
I'm two brains about this girl
Two things about this world
You got to know when to get some and when to get off (Yeah, come on)
Two brains about this girl
Two things about this world
You got to know when to get some and when to get off (Yeah, come on)
[Verse 2]
Come on, man, just let me do this
Okay, I just happen to have a list of reasons why sex is bad
Number one; we don't have a condom
There's one in our wallet, solved that problem
The condom's like, from seventh grade
Wipe the dust off, it's okay
What if it breaks?
Not my mistake, not my concern, as long as I don't get burned
(You're such an idiot!)
No, we're sex deprived
We masturbate more than ten other guys combined
We jerk off like all of the time, I'm surprised no one asks what's wrong with my eyes
(You're exaggerating.)
Am I, really? Why are there sperm-cicles hanging from the ceiling?
Because we don't have a girlfriend
Fuck that shit, if we had a girlfriend she'd cut off our dick
She'd put it in a jar and place it in a cabinet
I've seen girls do it and I'm not fucking having it
Number three, STDs, HIV
Fine with me, as long as I see these nuts in her mouth
What the fuck are you talking about?
Talking 'bout getting some ass, having a blast, blowing a load, you remember Nicole?
(Oh yeah, Nicole from summer camp!)
When everyone was asleep, she'd come in your tent
You came in your pants from grinding so slow
My dick was chafed for like, a month or so
Those were great times, don't let 'em go, we hardly ever get ass anymore, come on, please?
[Outro]
(I don't know, man)
Please?
(I-I don't- I don't think it's-)
Please?
You always win
(Yes!) Alright, time to go in
