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Polyamorous Lyrics by Chris Fleming

Showpig

2017

Just because I have bad hair doesn't mean that I'm polyamorous
("Yeah, we've been meaning to tell you for a while...we're poly now.")
There is something very [disturbing grunts]
About polyamorous couples

It's never who you want to be polyamorous who's polyamorous
You're never like, oh sweet!
It's usually the guy at the Verizon store
Who wears vests to parties

The kinda guy who'll neg you at like a continental breakfast buffet
But not even confidently neg you
Like, midway he'll try and desperately shove his hand into his pocket and miss
His hand's like a Romanian woman trying to seek sanctuary in an 18th century French church
You know a guy got into Radiohead too young if even his pocket rejects him

I'm poly!
And when they tell you it's with such glee
Like a dog dropping a rodent carcass at your feet
Like, this only benefits you and is menacing to me
And everyone else

It's never who you want to be polyamorous who's polyamorous
You're never like, oh sweet!
You're usually like, could I get helicopter to take me to safety?

[Spoken intermission]
COUPLE: It's so nice to see you, but...we do have something real quick that we just need to tell you about
CHRIS: Oh, sure tell me!
COUPLE: We're polyamorous! [cackling] Did you know that humans aren't naturally monogamous?

[Singing]
I should have known how you kept going on
About how welcoming the burlesque community's been
I sensed something conspiratorial before
But I just thought you were gonna try and get me to play a board game or something

Side note, board game couples give off
An even more menacing vibe than poly couples
Credits
Chris Fleming

Chris Fleming

About “Polyamorous” by Chris Fleming

Read the complete lyrics to "Polyamorous" by Chris Fleming from the album "Showpig" in 2017. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Comedy, Pop.

"Polyamorous" is performed by Chris Fleming. from the album "Showpig" in 2017 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Polyamorous", explore more songs by Chris Fleming using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

View all songs and biography for Chris Fleming · Trending lyrics · Billboard Hot 100

Frequently asked questions

"Polyamorous" is credited to Chris Fleming. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Polyamorous" appears on "Showpig" in 2017.

Visit the Chris Fleming artist page at /artist/chris-fleming for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.

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One-Woman Show
Grad Student Shuffle
My Boba Manifesto
Sharp Feminine Energy & The Chihuahua
Chris’ Look/Eddie’s Big Rule
I’m Afraid to Talk to Men
Sick Jan
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