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1/2 Lyrics by Cledus T. Judd

Cledus Envy

0

Parody of "Yes" by Chad Brock (Stephony Smith/Jim Collins/Chad Brock)
Hey everybody welcome out tonight
Hope you're having a good time out there
Don't forget the waitresses and a coming up next
We got Sheena on the main stage
Athena on the disco
And don't forget we got
:(chorus) Take it off baby
: Those recliner dancers in the back
: Stick around and get those dollar bills out guys and tip tip tip
Take it off baby
Take it off baby
Well here's how this whole mess got started
Had a stripper at a bachelor party
I knew when she jumped out of that cake
We were meant to be
The next date we both flew off to Vegas
I must have been an ignoramus
I honestly believed that she
Loved me just for me
Oh...wasn't six months it came to an end
I walked out of the courtroom crying
She left with a grin
Cause she got half
And I said "OW!"
I mean dang
That comes to nearly fifty thou
Per date
My butt had never been so chafed
Cause she got half
I wondered if I'd remain lonely
Or would I find my one and only
Then the answer to my prayers
Appeared on my TV
(Call me now)
The cutest little tarot card reader
I knew that I just had to meet her
Then she said it was in the cards
For her to marry me
Oh...wasn't three months later I was in court again
No way she could have predicted
The way it would end
Cause I got half
And she said "OW!"
Two dollars a minute
So everyone call right now
Your
Future awaits
And I will be the next Bill Gates
Cause I get half
Sometimes you're better off as friends
Cause if it ever ends
Then they get half
And you'll say "OW"
So I'm not looking to get married right now
I've
Got a date
With a beautiful Playboy Playmate
Who won't get half
No she won't get half
Credits
Cledus T. Judd

Cledus T. Judd

About “1/2” by Cledus T. Judd

Read the complete lyrics to "1/2" by Cledus T. Judd from the album "Cledus Envy". On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Pop.

"1/2" is performed by Cledus T. Judd. from the album "Cledus Envy" This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "1/2", explore more songs by Cledus T. Judd using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"1/2" is credited to Cledus T. Judd. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"1/2" appears on "Cledus Envy".

Visit the Cledus T. Judd artist page at /artist/cledus-t-judd for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.