[Verse 1]
My face has had more hits than MySpace
That's why my nose is crooked and leans sideways
All because I'm hard headed
Used to be inside the bar gettin' hard liquor
Just maxin' my card limit
Was missin' my ex girlfriend and it
Felt like the world ended
Started blackin' out, the days of when I'd hurl, finished
So in Colorado and Kansas
I got jumped cause my dumbass had swolled bottles of Xanax
Quit drinkin' and takin' pills and all those problems would vanish
That's what happened with Icon but I won't argue semantics
In '09, I've dealt with way too many natural losses
In March, my new girl dumped me
Fuck it, I'm past it, I'll chalk it
Then just when I was able to laugh it off, nauseous
Last May, my mom passed away from natural causes
Bad enough in June all month I'm reminded my dad's gone all day
Now what, I gotta write a song called May?
Guess that's life a bigger problem, just another day
I lost my dad the month of Father's Day
My mom the month of Mother's Day
Now grandpa's sick, I dont know what the fuck to say
[Hook]
I step off stage and I'm the only one
Mom and pops had an only son
No fans, just a man findin' freedom in truth
Spend my soul in a confession booth
[Verse 2]
I am a sinner saved by the grace of God
At 31 years of age, countless tears are on my face
How am I here, I'm amazed; I've been scraped and scared
I lost both parents, but hey, pray both spirits are safe
I hope they are okay but God's still got my sister and grandparents
But grandpa's got cancer and I can't bare it
They say the chemo's shrinken it, can't think of it not workin'
They say meds help his pain, but of his brain, I'm not certain
It's been four months without my best friend (mom)
My mom was always in my corner, even when I was arrested
Even, when I was in the wrong she'd defend me
But she's with God now believe you me, I'm green with envy (of both)
I can't believe my life some times, I need to write some rhymes
Keeps me sane when everything else isn't quite sublime
My sweet mother used to keep to me in line
Any women who reminds me of her I need by my side
They say seek and you'll find, Believe me if tried
And I won't stop
She can be my wife and I can be my own pops
Reincarnated, finished cheating
Never understood what gives men a reason for woman beating
Not saying that my dad did it
Maybe once he wasn't bad with it
But the one time he did it left a bad image
So I've learned from other peoples mistakes
And tried to learn from evil they've placed
On people I've faced
Yup, these are the breaks
But sometimes the parts are too broken
To grab a tube of super glue and stick the pieces in place (confessional)
[Hook]
[Verse 3]
Im trying to do with ought my selfish ways but
All I can think about is my self today
See I owe it to myself, but I dont know if I can go within my self
And make changes like sobering myself
The irony, The higher I can see, I'm lowering my health
Plus it's cold up in my cell and there's no one here to help
Yeah I served a little time for a DUI
See you drink, but they don't wanna see you drive
"Officer, they don't have slumber parties at the bar
So pardon me if rum and Bacardi Breezer is in my car"
And I can make claims that alcohol isn't my main thing
Yet I'm the one sitting with lemon squeezed in my gray drink
Fuck, I had a stressful year
Quite a eventful and regretful year
I had to shed some tears
I had to grab some liquor, I had to get some beer
To get some clear thoughts to fuckin get me here
Hit this fork in the road; Lookin' back losing all that I know
And then lookin' forward, what more do I know?
I know pain-addiction-pain-death-pain
Took the right path slowed down and said bye to the left lane
Cause life in the fast lane was stifle and mad strange
Vicodin mad canes, try to lighten my past pains
But my habits could end my life in a bad way
