Lyrks
Lyrks
Sign In
Cover Art

Crap Artists Lyrics by Despot

Crap Artists / Substance D

2006

[Verse 1: Despot]
Everyone clap for the crap artists
A pat on the back to whichever one sounds smartest
Capture the magic of blabberin' half-hearted
And the last rambling man standing laughs hardest
Pan-handling a grand, standing on red carpets
Doing the camera flash dance in new pants, targets
Tune in to catch a glance of a new fad starting
They only listen when you spittin' what the bad part is
Eyes glazed over, watch your idols cry for food
Words big as their appetites and none of them are true
Fresh out of shit to say but still got plenty to prove
Like these words were made for talking and talking's not for you
My sleeves are stuffed with better ways to say things
I pull them out at the first hint of the spell breaking
Real magic making for an honorable mention
So clap where people can see you my ego needs tending
Only tip my hat to cats with scratch to toss in it
Fill it up, while the rabbit distracts the lost children
Make a living off of milking them for teardrops
And mashing words together till the mother fucking beat stops
Soon enough they'll tell you that you're spouting out their dreams
Not the racket of an idiot with eyes on that supreme spot
And a folding chair to pull up at the top
For a seat next to the toilet where the shit that doesn't stink drops
Could almost see it every time I pitch rocks
Camped out in a glass house with a slingshot

[Hook: Despot]
I get paid to breathe
Hooray for me
Hooray for me
Hooray for me
I get paid to breathe
Hooray for me
Hooray for me
Hooray for me
I get paid to breathe
Hooray for me
Hooray for me
Hooray for me

[Verse 2: Despot]
Great job rapping, now the second-hand knows your name
And is playing bloody knuckles with your 15 minutes of fame
That spot on the top 10 list's just a stain
But everything looks better when you put it in a frame
Just hang it next to that impressive portrait in your pane
And nag about how it's unfortunate to be the same
Charge 'em for a peek, push 'em out quick, "Thanks for coming."
Super-star mystique; couldn't see what, but it was stunning
Get every whimpering crowd buzzin'
Till that old fat lady's too weak to sing above it
So it's over when it's muffled by the rumble of her stomach
Or somebody dents a shovel thinking they finally struck it
For the deeper meaning, dig cause your treasure's a whoopie cushion
And a fresh new grave you already put your foot in
Sitting on a secret, now you're embarrassed for looking
And that big red button looks about ripe for pushing
Someone mistook the magic beans for food
So whoever fart the loudest is obviously the truth
And what could make me prouder than pouring salt in the wounds
Of them kids who still believe cows jump over moons
Something to do while making sure you all stay dizzy
Ball up the fist, squeeze the life out of pretty
Wait until their back's turned, screaming "Don't hit me!"
And they'll find no pity, cause the sign said "Kick Me"

[Hook: Despot]
I get paid to breathe
Hooray for me
Hooray for me
Hooray for me
I get paid to breathe
Hooray for me
Hooray for me
Hooray for me
I get paid to breathe
Hooray for me
Hooray for me
Hooray for me
Credits
Despot

Despot

About “Crap Artists” by Despot

Read the complete lyrics to "Crap Artists" by Despot from the album "Crap Artists / Substance D" in 2006. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Rap.

"Crap Artists" is performed by Despot. from the album "Crap Artists / Substance D" in 2006 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Crap Artists", explore more songs by Despot using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

View all songs and biography for Despot · Trending lyrics · Billboard Hot 100

Frequently asked questions

"Crap Artists" is credited to Despot. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Crap Artists" appears on "Crap Artists / Substance D" in 2006.

Visit the Despot artist page at /artist/despot for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.

Homesickness
Forbidden
Crap Artists (Acapella)
Egregious
Freestyle
Auto-da-Fe
Crap Artists (Instrumental)
Get Rich or Try Dying
Lyrks
Lyrks

Your gateway to the world of music lyrics.

Product

Features

Company

About

Artists

Trending

Legal

Privacy

Terms

Copyright

Support

Contact

Features

Charts

© 2026 Lyrks. All rights reserved.