The Ghetto Law EditorialBy DizzyDDizzy
Now to start this off, I'll answer a few questions, likely the first that comes to mind would be "What is 'Ghetto Law'?" This, to those that have heard the term, is a simple answer, but to those that have not, it may be confusing. Essentially, 'Ghetto Law' (henceforth referred to as "GL") is the science of staying on the exact minimum you have to uphold to not be doing something illegal. I am not a lawyer, just fore-warning you, and by reading this and it's 'advice' you are agreeing to take nothing I say as fact, and not hold me responsible should you be arrested for following this advice, now, let us begin.
Chapter 1: The Breakdown
In order to ad-here to GL you have to know basic laws and rights, and also be good with confrontation, if you're not, please don't attempt this. In this short chapter, we will be going over the basics of GL, as well as a couple useage scenarios. The first thing that we'll be going over is how to deal with cops, and what tactics you can use to uphold your rights better than the average citizen. In this, we'll be going over traffic stops, arrests, house visits, and searches of property, whether it be vehicular or domestic.
The first thing we'll be going over is traffic stops, the advice I give in this chapter is not to be used with impunity, and if the cop does not know the law, you may be arrested, wrongfully so, but still arrested. Let's say you ran a red light, and 1 officer approaches the drivers side window, have your license, registration, insurance if required, and if you have a CCW (Concealed Carry Permit) that as well, depending on your state. Roll down the window only as far as you feel comfortable, a window won't stop bullets, but it will prevent the cop from forcing his way into your car. When talking to the cop, be nice, don't be rude, and don't insult him, regardless of how you feel about cops, he will arrest you wrongfully if you insult him seven times out of ten. Ask which red light it was, and ask for proof, likely in your state there are cameras at your stoplights, and these will be evidence that you did or did not run the red light. If you truly do not want to pay a ticket, you can take this to court and dispute the cop forcing them to bring up the footage, which will prove you innocent or guilty. But back to dealing with the cop at end. When he goes away to check your license and run your plate number, keep your hands on the wheel, taking them off will make him nervous, and lead him to detain you.
When he gets back, he may give you a ticket, which you could dispute, he mave give you a warning if you've never ran a light before, or he may attempt to force you to leave the vehicle. The other 2 scenarios have been covered, so let's take care of him trying to make you leave the vehicle. If he wants you to get out of the car, he has to have probable cause, which you can ask for, meaning he has to tell you why he wants you to get out, or he's doing something illegal. Ask him if you're being detained as well, don't keep repeating it like a jackass, just ask once or twice, and if he doesn't answer, don't get out of the vehicle, keep your voice normal volume, and keep your hands on the wheel however. If he has probably cause, or is detaining you, he can search your vehicle, remember that, but if you willingly get out of the vehicle, and he does not have PC (probably cause) and is not detaining you, he cannot search your vehicle, explicitly tell him you do not consent to a search, and he will have to detain you if he wants to search your vehicle. If you have anything illegal in plane sight, such as the passenger seat, or backseat, he can search your car, but if you do not, he is going completel outside of the law, and it will hold up in court. If he searches the trunk, center console, or glove box without your consent, and without detaining you, he is violating the fifth amendment, and is in serious trouble, the likely punishment for him doing this is firing, violating any constitutional ammendments if a 'big no no' for cops, and gets them a lot worse than 2 weeks paid leave, trust me.
Chapter 2: House Searches And Arrests.
Well reader, it seems as if the cops are knocking on your door asking about recent burglaries in the neighborhood, and they want to ask you some questions, they also would like to come in and sit down, they've been on the job all day, don't you have any basic human kindness? Let 'em in.
No! As soon as the cops are given permission to enter your home, you've also given them permission to search the place, well, not technically, they still have to ask or have probably cause, but because you invited them in, any evidence they find, they can simply say it was in plain view, and thus make it legally permissiable. Instead, don't let them in, don't tell them anything, and don't respond after you've told them they need a warrant to come in. If you have security gates, or have a chain on on your door, only open one door, or keep the chain still on the door, if you don't have either, just talk through the door. If they attempt to force their way in, you can fight back completely legally, they might mace or shoot you, but assuming you don't die, you'll win lots of money. That was facetious, don't fight back unless you're willing to end their lives, because that's what you'll have to do if you don't want to be killed or locked up for 1+ years. Cops become private citizens as soon as they break the law, or threaten your life without you being a danger to them or others, so yes, shooting them is legal if they search your home without a warrant, but please don't, it's not worth it. The best way to avoid this confrontation is talk through the door, or behind the gate or chain, don't let them search your house, and do not cooperate. This will give you legal impunity.
Chapter 3: Closing, And Other Uses
The previous chapters covered issues with cops, now let's use ghetto law to make your life better! (editors note: "Better", in this sense, does not mean an improvement, and was used sarcastically.) I will cover a couple topics that you probably will use ghetto law for, and then we'll close. If you're a producer, or a rapper that makes his own beats, you probably knew this, but if you didn't, then this may amaze you. If you take a beat, copy the bass line in it, and repeat 1-2 claps or kicks in 2 different spots, and increase or decrease the tempo by a small amount (we're talking less than 4% here, just 1-2 beats per minutes increase after you add 1-2 beats 3 times.) you have legally made the beat your own, and are free to use it as you please. This is a great thing for those wishing to sell their music, but don't have (insert stupid dollar amount) for clearing a sample.
If you're a shoplifter, check your state laws first people, but it's likely that shoplifting is only defined as 'taking property from a business off business grounds without consent' (Note: 'Consent' also apllies to paying) so if you put items in your pockets, or purse, fanny pack, whatever, it's not illegal if you get caught, as long as you did not leave store grounds. A lot of stores have the shoplifting law posted, so find one YOU DON'T want to steal from, and read it there if you can't search it on google or similar search engine.
Late on loan payments? Depending on what contract you signed, you may never have to pay it back as long as you pay the interest, the interest will outway the loan amount in less than a year, but if you truly do not have money for the interest and payments, paying the interest, assuming you didn't wave that right in a contract or terms of use agreement, will allow you to have another couples months/weeks to continue saving to pay it back.
Now before we close, I want to let you all know you may message me at any time if you have questions, my name on Rap Genius is the same as who this essay is by, so contact me whenever.
In closing, I'd like to thank @Skorg (currently named @Staff-Alt) for giving me the title of this, and influencing me to actually wright it. I'd like to thank my poor childhood for my knowledge of ghetto law, and my love of pissing people off as well, because without those, I'd probably not be the same person I am today. I hope this helps you all improve your lives and deal with tough situations, and thanks for reading.
(DizzyDDizzy is not responsible for any outcomes of using the information provided in this text, by reading this page, you are agreeing to not hold him responsible for anything that happens to you, whether 'good' or 'bad'. HE IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR LEGAL FEES, AND CANNOT BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE THAT THIS INFORMATION IS CORRECT OR LEGALLY UPSTANDING IN ANYWAY, AND YOU WAVE YOUR RIGHT TO SUE OR BRING CHARGES AGAINST HIM BY READING THIS PAGE. IF YOU DO NOT AGREE TO THESE TERMS, DO YOU READ THE PAGE.)
