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Vastra Investigates Lyrics by Doctor Who

Minisodes

2012

[Hallway]
(Strax the Sontaran Butler is putting handcuffs on a man.)
STRAX: Prepare for obliteration, Earthling scum.
INSPECTOR: Actually, Mister Strax, if you could just take him aside for a moment, I have some officers on the way.
STRAX: As you wish. Humans.
JENNY: Sorry. He is new.
INSPECTOR: Funny looking fellow but, Turkish, is he?
VASTRA: He is a genetically modified clone warrior from outer space.
INSPECTOR: Ah. Makes sense. Well, what a case. Identical twins, poison undetectable to science, an ancient Egyptian curse. Once more Scotland Yard is in your debt, Madame Vastra. Where would we be without you?
VASTRA: Quite some distance from a clue, one imagines.
INSPECTOR: You might be right. Does it ever hurt?
VASTRA: Does what hurt?
INSPECTOR: Your skin condition. Always wondered.
JENNY: It's not a condition, Inspector. It's just skin.
INSPECTOR: Are you sure?
VASTRA: I am, as I may have failed to mention, an intelligent reptile from an ancient civilisation long preceding mankind. Many of us slumber under the Earth's crust.
JENNY: Madame was accidentally awoken by an extension to the London Underground.
INSPECTOR: Well, that would account for it.
VASTRA: I was not initially keen on the society of apes, but I made the most elementary of errors. I fell in love.
(Vastra and Jenny gaze into each others eyes.)
INSPECTOR: What, with the Turkish fellow?
VASTRA: No. Not with the Turkish fellow.
INSPECTOR: Good lord. Good lord.
VASTRA: Come along, my dear.
JENNY: Yes, my darling.
INSPECTOR: Good lord.
[Carriage]
JENNY: Still no word from the Doctor, then?
VASTRA: No, my dear. And there won't be.
JENNY: He can't sulk in his box forever.
VASTRA: Heartbreak is a burden to us all. Pity the man with two.
JENNY: It's starting to snow.
VASTRA: But it can't be.
JENNY: Well, it is nearly Christmas.
VASTRA: But the clouds.
JENNY: What about them?
VASTRA: There aren't any.
Credits
Doctor Who

Doctor Who

About “Vastra Investigates” by Doctor Who

Read the complete lyrics to "Vastra Investigates" by Doctor Who from the album "Minisodes " in 2012. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Non-Music.

"Vastra Investigates" is performed by Doctor Who. from the album "Minisodes " in 2012 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Vastra Investigates", explore more songs by Doctor Who using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Vastra Investigates" is credited to Doctor Who. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Vastra Investigates" appears on "Minisodes " in 2012.

Visit the Doctor Who artist page at /artist/doctor-who for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.