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Jojoba’s Witness Lyrics by DubleAADank

A DubleAADank Christmas Card

2017

[Intro: J-Had & Captain Zucc]
Hello sir, have you heard about our lord and savior Simmondsia Chinensis?
Boy what the fu-
Excuse me sir, we need your shampoo
[Verse 1: J-Had]
Being’ a JJ witness ain’t easy
Simmondsia Chinensis is my deity
Shampoo is my cause
Screw Santa Claus
I gotta bank for shampoo withdrawals
Hold the applause
‘Cause that’s not like me
Don’t like Chinensis? Then you can fight me
Aphrodite almighty?
Pray to Simmondsia Chinensis or I’ll smite thee
Don’t take it lightly
Aw crikey, Jojoba baptized me
Latencies, a faint thing to see
‘specially when Jojoba grows on a tree
Now, become a shampoo worshipper with me
[Verse 2: Andawg]
The shampoo flow
Has been kinda slow
Not as slow as Lil’ Gnarly though
Bringing the final blow
Let the Jojoba grow
Make the dough
Living in Monaco, oh
You haven’t heard the last of me yet
Got my Lhasa Apso, Capital of Tibet
Royal Nigerian Prince
But he could not convince, and so I dismissed
I’ve gotta broken ankle and i need a podiatrist
Spare some shampoo
Help a brother get through
Some tough times
In turn I’m dropping rhymes
I’m making half time
Being a Jojoba witness ain’t a crime
[Verse 3: Captain Zucc]
Yo, I’m sick of this, so get off my property
Orange flip floppety, it’s an atrocity
I’m gonna throw you off my lawn at high velocity
I know, I don’t have much generosity
I need some shampoo for my hair porosity
Don’t worry, it’s a trait of homozygosity
It’s Christmas Time
And I’m dropping mad rhymes
All ya’ll trying to be sublime
But to me it’s just a punchline
The sun’s gonna come up, shampoo or not
Now get away from my house before I need a mugshot
Pull out the sniper, boom headshot
Or I could go old-fashioned put you in a headlock
[Outro: J-Had, Captain Zucc, & AnDawg]
Oof, alright man I’m outta here
Yo man, I got the shampoo!
Hey, what are you doing?! Knock it off!
You win this round, Jojoba!
Consider this a coda!
I’ll get my shampoo back, whatever it takes
Not gonna give it to a bunch of fakes
Credits
DubleAADank

DubleAADank

About “Jojoba’s Witness” by DubleAADank

Read the complete lyrics to "Jojoba’s Witness" by DubleAADank from the album "A DubleAADank Christmas Card" in 2017. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Rap.

"Jojoba’s Witness" is performed by DubleAADank. from the album "A DubleAADank Christmas Card" in 2017 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Jojoba’s Witness", explore more songs by DubleAADank using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Jojoba’s Witness" is credited to DubleAADank. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Jojoba’s Witness" appears on "A DubleAADank Christmas Card" in 2017.

Visit the DubleAADank artist page at /artist/dubleaadank for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.