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The Ryanair Song (LIVE) Lyrics by Foil Arms and Hog

The Ryanair Song

2019

HOG:
I'm...
Flying Ryanair
'Cause I got no money
I can't afford
An Aerlingus seat
UNISON:
He's got no space
For his feet
SPOKEN:
Final call, final call now
For Ryanair flight FR to Alicante
Now boarding at a gate
That couldn't possibly
Be further away
HOG:
I'm running to the gate
The ticket says I'm late
Oh no, I'm not
Three hours standing in the queue
UNISON:
We left you standing there
The jokes on you!
HOG:
I got my carry on bag
It's kinda big
I'm starting to worry
I'm starting to twitch
UNISON:
Going to be stopped
By the baggage bitch
(Spoken)
ARMS: Excuse me, could I see your bag please?
HOG: Eh... it's just a small bag
ARMS: Oh it's just a small bag, is it? We'll just have a small look, so
ARMS: Just pop it in the cage there we'll have a quick check
HOG: Ahh, it's not heavy
ARMS: Just pop in the cage there. We'll all have a good laugh
ARMS: Stick in there now
HOG: It's not even heavy
ARMS: Smells heavy. I can smell the dimensions
Just pop it in there and move along quickly
HOG: Ah, be sound
ARMS: Ah go on now
HOG: Ah, come on
ARMS: Ooh, you're trying my patience
HOG: I..
ARMS: Oh God, you're trying my patience
ARMS:Get in the cage!
HOG: Oh Jesus!
FOIL: Yeah
HOG: Yeah, yeah!
ARMS: Leave the bag
HOG: Yeah
ARMS: You in!
HOG: I'm in the cage
ARMS: All the way. Your arse is sticking out
FOIL: No, no...
ARMS: NO HELPING
HOG: I can fit! I can fit
ARMS: That'll be a hundred and twenty euro
Ooh, I love my job
HOG::
She's....
Got a face
Like she's never been laid
But she's going to do me
With the extra charge
UNISON
Doing you from behind...
With your credit card
(Spoken)
ARMS:
Thank you all for flying Ryanair
We know you've had a shit time
But eh...
You'll be back
'Cause you're poor!
ARMS:
I'm booking another flight
I'm loosing patience
Cause the website
Is a pile of
(Spoken)
ARMS: Excuse me! Would you like travel insurance?
HOG: No. No I don't
ARMS: Ok. Have you changed your mind?
Have you changed your mind about the travel insurance?
HOG, No, I haven't changed my mind, no
ARMS: Ok, no worries, how about now?
HOG: No
ARMS: No, I'm just checking, now?
And now again
Would you like to click the box that says you want travel insurance
HOG: No, I don't want that!
ARMS: Would you like to click the box that says you don't want travel insurance?
HOG: Yeah, yeah
ARMS: Would you like to click the box that says you do not not not not do not not not not not not do not not not not mlulelelelelel
HOG: Alright yeah
ARMS: You just bought travel insurance
FOIL: Ah, fuck it!
HOG:
I'm trying to book the flight
(Spoken)
ARMS: Hertz car rental?
FOIL: No. No
ARMS: Do you want it?
HOG: No
ARMS: Samsanite bag?
FOIL: No, thank you
ARMS: Ryanair TalkTalk telephone card?
Ryanair scratch cards?
Helping children's charitys
HOG: No
ARMS: Do you want smokeless cigarettes?
HOG: No
ARMS: Do you want a used car?
Or a lawnmower?
I'm just trying to get rid of it at the moment
It's actually a pretty good deal
HOG: How much is the lawnmower?
ARMS: It's 60 quid for the whole thing
HOG: 60 quid?
ARMS: Yeah yeah. You just bought travel insurance
FOIL: Oh for fuck's sake!
HOG:
I'm trying to book the...
(Spoken)
ARMS: I'm sorry you have been timed out
Credits
Foil Arms and Hog

Foil Arms and Hog

About “The Ryanair Song (LIVE)” by Foil Arms and Hog

Read the complete lyrics to "The Ryanair Song (LIVE)" by Foil Arms and Hog from the album "The Ryanair Song" in 2019. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Country.

"The Ryanair Song (LIVE)" is performed by Foil Arms and Hog. from the album "The Ryanair Song" in 2019 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "The Ryanair Song (LIVE)", explore more songs by Foil Arms and Hog using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"The Ryanair Song (LIVE)" is credited to Foil Arms and Hog. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"The Ryanair Song (LIVE)" appears on "The Ryanair Song" in 2019.

Visit the Foil Arms and Hog artist page at /artist/foil-arms-and-hog for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.