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Cover Art

Advertising Intro Lyrics by George Carlin

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Quality, value, style, service, selection, convenience
Economy, savings, performance, experience, hospitality
Low rates, friendly service, name brands, easy terms
Affordable prices, money-back guarantee

Free installation, free admission, free appraisal, free alterations
Free delivery, free estimates, free home trial, and free parking

No cash? No problem! No kidding! No fuss, no muss
No risk, no obligation, no red tape, no down payment
No entry fee, no hidden charges, no purchase necessary
No one will call on you, no payments or interest till September

Limited time only, though, so act now, order today, send no money
Offer good while supplies last, two to a customer, each item sold separately
Batteries not included, mileage may vary, all sales are final
Allow six weeks for delivery, some items not available
Some assembly required, some restrictions may apply

So come on in for a free demonstration and a free consultation
With our friendly, professional staff. Our experienced and
Knowledgeable sales representatives will help you make a
Selection that's just right for you and just right for your budget

And say, don't forget to pick up your free gift: a classic deluxe
Custom designer luxury prestige high-quality premium select
Gourmet pocket pencil sharpener. Yours for the asking
No purchase necessary. It's our way of saying thank you

And if you act now, we'll include an extra added free complimentary
Bonus gift at no cost to you: a classic deluxe custom designer
Luxury prestige high-quality premium select gourmet combination
Key ring, magnifying glass, and garden hose, in a genuine
Imitation leather-style carrying case with authentic vinyl trim
Yours for the asking, no purchase necessary. It's our way of
Saying thank you

Actually, it's our way of saying 'Bend over just a little farther
So we can stick this big advertising dick up your ass a little bit
Deeper, a little bit deeper, a little bit DEEPER, you miserable
No-good dumbass fucking consumer!'
Credits
George Carlin

George Carlin

About “Advertising Intro” by George Carlin

Read the complete lyrics to "Advertising Intro" by George Carlin. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Pop.

"Advertising Intro" is performed by George Carlin. This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Advertising Intro", explore more songs by George Carlin using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

View all songs and biography for George Carlin · Trending lyrics · Billboard Hot 100

Frequently asked questions

"Advertising Intro" is credited to George Carlin. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

Album information for "Advertising Intro" is not available in our database yet. You can still read the full lyrics on this page.

Visit the George Carlin artist page at /artist/george-carlin for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.

Answering Machines
Action-6 News
A Place For My Stuff
Acknowledgements
Airline Announcements
1996 HBO Special on Pro-Lifers and Abortion
Abortion
America
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