[MR. REYES, spoken]
Places for scene two! People, remember: Once Puck gives you the pansy serum, you have to really sell that you're transforming into a zombie. Excellent work, Ms. Valentine
[JEREMY, spoken]
Excellent? But Chloe's terrible, she never remembers her-
Mr. Reyes? You can't let anyone drink from that beaker!
[MR REYES, spoken]
Don't be silly! It's more than safe! I should know, I tried it myself
[SQUIP, spoken]
Up, up, down, down, left, right, A
[JEREMY, spoken]
I have to get out there!
[MR REYES, spoken]
I can't let you do that, Jeremy
[JEREMY, spoken]
Mr. Reyes?
[MR REYES, spoken]
You needy, pathetic, self-centered students!
You think I wanted to teach high school drama? In NEW JERSEY?
My SQUIP says I can go all the way to Broadway!
I just have to keep you from ruining my big night!
[JEREMY, spoken]
You're going to SQUIP the whole cast!
[SQUIP, spoken]
That's just for starters!
[JEREMY, spoken]
That's not what I wanted!
[SQUIP, spoken]
It's the only way to achieve what you want!
[JEREMY, spoken]
I'll fight back! Alcohol messes you up, right? I'll get drunk!
[SQUIP, spoken]
And I'll be back when you're sober! Unless you plan on staying wasted forever?
[JEREMY, spoken]
You're a computer, there has to be a way to turn you off
[SQUIP, spoken]
I would stop there. You don't want to end up like Rich
[JEREMY, spoken]
Rich? What did he-?
[RICH, echoed]
I need Mountain Dew Red!
[JEREMY, spoken]
That's it! Green Mountain Dew activates you, Red shuts you off!
[SQUIP, spoken]
Why do you think we had it discontinued? To get rid of me now, you'd need a time machine to the 1990's!
[JEREMY, spoken]
Or a friend who's so old-school he buys 90's soft drinks from the back room at Spencer's gifts!
[SQUIP, spoken]
*gasp* Too bad you don't have one of those... anymore
[JEREMY, spoken]
Michael! Call Michael!
[SQUIP, spoken]
I'm going to improve your life, Jeremy, if I have to take over the entire student body to do it!
[MICHAEL]
Michael makes an entrance! (Haha)
[JEREMY, spoken]
Michael!
[MICHAEL, spoken]
I was just in the audience, thinking "This is pretty good for a school play!"
Then I was like... "This is way too good for a school play!!!!" They've all been Squipped, right?
[JEREMY, spoken]
W-W-Wait, you came to see me in the play?
[MICHAEL, spoken]
Even brought my own refreshments!
[ENSEMBLE]
Ah ah ah ah ah ah!
[JEREMY, spoken]
Is that?!
[MICHAEL, spoken]
Mountain Dew Red! Told you I did my research! Oh, hey, Jake? This is gonna sound weird, but if I hold down Jeremy, can you make him drink this Mountain Dew Red?
[JAKE, spoken]
Actually, that doesn't sound weird at all
[SQUIP, spoken]
Up, up, down, down, left, right, A
[JAKE, spoken]
Ow!
[SQUIP, spoken]
Ha ha ha
[JAKE]
I was already pretty boss before
Now I'm totally boss and then some more!
I'm livin' the upgrade!
[CHLOE AND BROOKE]
There you are, Jeremy
La la la la la
La la la la la
La la la la la la la la
[BROOKE, spoken]
I just want you to know I'm not mad that you broke my heart and then slept with my best friend
[CHLOE, spoken]
And I'm not mad you dated my best friend and wouldn't sleep with me
[BROOKE, spoken]
He didn't sleep with you?
[CHLOE, spoken]
No
[BROOKE, spoken]
He didn't sleep with me!
[CHLOE, spoken]
No!
[BOTH, spoken]
Oh my god, why was I so jealous of you? *gasp* You were jealous of me? That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me! Sisters forever! Jinx!
[MICHAEL, spoken]
Ugh...
[JEREMY, spoken]
Michael, the bottle! There's still a few drops left!
[MICHAEL, spoken]
How am I supposed to get past them?
[JEREMY, spoken]
Apocalypse of the Damned! Level Nine!
[BOTH, spoken]
The Cafetorium!
[MICHAEL, spoken]
Got it!
[BOTH]
Find the bad guy, push 'em aside
Then move on forward with your friend at your side!
It's a two player game, so when they make an attack
You know you got a brother gonna have your back!
Then you stay on track and- Ah!- remain on course
And if they give you a smack you- Gah!- you use your force
And if you leave your brother behind that's lame
'Cause it's an effed up world but it's a two player game!
Hey!
[JENNA ROLAN, spoken]
I know what you're doing, Michael
I know what everyone's doing! All the time!
[THE CAST OF THE PLAY, spoken]
I just feel soooo connected to you guys right now!
[SQUIP, spoken]
Ah! You don't want to drink that, Jeremy!
[JEREMY, spoken]
Why not?
[SQUIP, spoken]
Because then you'll never be with her!
[CHRISTINE]
You are the person I want to be with every day
And this is something that I've been afraid to say
[JEREMY, spoken]
That is not Christine
[SQUIP, spoken]
I assure you, it is! Only her fears and insecurities have been removed!
[CHRISTINE & ENSEMBLE]
You're the guy I am so kinda into (into)
The guy I am totally into (into)
This feeling is new
Jeremy
I love you
[SQUIP, spoken]
That's your cue!
[JEREMY, spoken]
She'll do whatever I want!
[SQUIP, spoken]
That's what I promised!
[JEREMY, spoken]
Great. Drink this
[SQUIP, spoken]
Wait-
[CHRISTINE]
Ah!
[ALL]
Ah!
[SQUIP, spoken]
Jeremy!
J-Je-Jeremy?
Jere-re
Ah
Woah
Ah
Woah
Ah
Woah
Woah!
Jeremy!
Jere-
Ah!
