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When The Kids Get Married Lyrics by Harvey Schmidt

I Do! I Do! (Original Broadway Cast Recording)

1966

[MICHAEL]
When the kids get married
I'm gonna spend each day in bed!
Chocolates in my pocket
A pillow underhead!
I'm gonna read just what I please
Even finish "War and Peace"
I wish they'd marry soon!
(spoken)
Agnes, would you pass me my collected Tolstoy, please?
Ah, thank you. Now if you'll just excuse me for a couple of years?
[AGNES, spoken]
Quite alright, dear, I have plans of my own
(sung)
When the kids get married
I'm gonna teach myself to paint
Nothing very fancy
Something kind of quaint!
I'm gonna paint the way we live
Call it "early primitive"
[BOTH]
I wish they'd marry soon!
[MICHAEL]
When the kids get married
I'm gonna play the saxophone
Practice 'til I master
Every golden tone
Then when I've got my sax in hand
I may form a little band!
[BOTH]
I wish they'd marry soon!
[AGNES]
When the kids get married
I'm gonna try the violin
Something nice and simple
That's how I'll begin
Then when I finish "Clair de Lune"
I'll attack another tune!
[BOTH]
I wish they'd marry soon!
[MICHAEL, spoken]
Agnes, here's your fiddle
[AGNES, spoken]
And Michael, here's your sax
[MICHAEL, spoken]
Thank you
[AGNES, spoken]
I've been waiting thirty years for this
(They play their instruments together, badly.)
[MICHAEL]
When the kids get married
We're gonna play for one and all
[AGNES]
Maybe give recitals
At Philharmonic Hall!
[BOTH]
We're gonna be a double bill:
The oldest team in Vaudeville
If they don't marry soon!
[MICHAEL]
I'm gonna spend a year in bed!
[AGNES]
I'm gonna dye my hair bright red!
[MICHAEL]
And I'm gonna learn to shoot some golf!
[AGNES]
I'm gonna take my girdle off!
[MICHAEL]
Play the sax
[AGNES]
Claire de Lune
[BOTH]
Take a second honeymoon
I wish they'd marry soon!
[AGNES, spoken]
Oh, Michael
Credits
Harvey Schmidt

Harvey Schmidt

About “When The Kids Get Married” by Harvey Schmidt

Read the complete lyrics to "When The Kids Get Married" by Harvey Schmidt from the album "I Do! I Do! (Original Broadway Cast Recording)" in 1966. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Musicals, Pop.

"When The Kids Get Married" is performed by Harvey Schmidt. from the album "I Do! I Do! (Original Broadway Cast Recording)" in 1966 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "When The Kids Get Married", explore more songs by Harvey Schmidt using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"When The Kids Get Married" is credited to Harvey Schmidt. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"When The Kids Get Married" appears on "I Do! I Do! (Original Broadway Cast Recording)" in 1966.

Visit the Harvey Schmidt artist page at /artist/harvey-schmidt for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.