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Flat! Lyrics by Hat Films

2016

[Intro: Alex Smith]
Hey, ya'll, straight talk, okay?
There's some flat out things I gotta say
Roundies, hear me out
Stop bending theories
It's time to straighten things out

[Verse 1: Alex Smith]
Edging in my bedroom got me thinkin' bout the edge
Not the guy from U2, the fucking earth ledge
Gotta prove you roundies wrong, so I strolled outside
Flat cap, flat battery, let's theorize

[Pre-Chorus 1: Alex Smith]
I took a really long stick and put it on the ground
That bitch stayed flat 'cause the Earth's not round!
The Earth is flat, and I'll prove it in this song
Just like my Mountain Dew that's been out too long

[Chorus: Alex Smith, Ross Hornby, Chris Trott]
My credit card flat!
My ruler, flat!
This paper flat!
Where I live, flat!
The tires on my bike flat!
The soda in my hand, flat!
My singing pitch flat!
This whole world flat!

[Verse 2: Alex Smith]
Open your damn eyes, you round earth clowns
Take a quick look now the sky is up, not down
If the Earth is round, we're sitting on the top
Then stuff at the bottom probably fell off

[Pre-Chorus 2: Alex Smith]
Dragons fly at the end of the Earth
Been soaring through the sky since our flat world's birth!
You're not believing us and calling us shmucks?
I'll show you what's round; take a look at deez nuts!

[Chorus: Alex Smith, Ross Hornby, Chris Trott]
My credit card flat!
My ruler, flat!
This paper flat!
Where I live, flat!
The tires on my bike flat!
The soda in my hand, flat!
My singing pitch flat!
This whole world flat!

[Verse 3: Alex Smith]
Clearly, the moons flat; there's no dark side
Nobody went there; NASA fucking lied
Hey roundies, how's that hot core doing?
You're filling kids' head with the shit you're spewin'

[Pre-Chorus 3: Alex Smith]
So I took a big boat
To the edge of the world
And before my little eyes, the truth unfurled
There were dragons and beasts and awful things like that
I sailed right home 'cause the world's so flat, yeah

[Chorus: Alex Smith, Ross Hornby, Chris Trott]
My credit card flat!
My ruler, flat!
This paper flat!
Where I live, flat!
The tires on my bike flat!
The soda in my hand, flat!
My singing pitch flat!
This whole world flat!

[Verse 4: Chris Trott]
Uh, excuse me, Sir, I believe your facts aren't sound
The circumference of the Earth is 40 megameters round
If the world is flat, which projection is factual?
Mercator, Gall-Peters, or maybe sinusoidal?
A globe is always right; the flat must be distorted
Which clearly means your theory is thwarted!
So the Earth, our home, is an oblate spheroid
I'm dropping the truth; your theory is destroyed!
You think the Earth's flat, just like your sister's chest
Well, that makes sense - you haven't seen real breasts!
Earth is the only planet not named after a Deity
It's a place of science and the home of your virginity!
Credits

About “Flat!” by Hat Films

Read the complete lyrics to "Flat!" by Hat Films in 2016. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Pop.

"Flat!" is performed by Hat Films. in 2016 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Flat!", explore more songs by Hat Films using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Flat!" is credited to Hat Films. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

Album information for "Flat!" is not available in our database yet. You can still read the full lyrics on this page.

Visit the Hat Films artist page at /artist/hat-films for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.


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