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Captain James Lyrics by Horse Bitch

2020

His name was Captain James
He was a handsome cowboy from space
Bounty hunting space demons
Was the name of his game
And his adventures had brought to him money and fame
But there was one space demon that he could never track
His name was space demon Roy
He peddled space heroin
He was covered in space tattoos
And had two heads on his shoulders
And it was said that he couldn’t have been any older than 22
Captain James got a lead
From a space hooker named Eileen
They had a space arrangement
Space sex for space information
In their regular space meeting
That occurred every space Tuesday
And Roy the space demon was living
On a big purple planet
Just outside a galaxy that I cannot name here
So Captain James left the space brothel
And left the doors swinging
He loaded his space gun
And he put on his space helmet
And then he strapped into his space car
He was certain that Roy
Would be no longer with us
By late tomorrow night
He rolled into a galaxy
Light years away
There were planets real close
He aimed the nose of his ship
At the purple planet
Where it was said that Roy lived
And when he landed by blue palm trees
Not a fear was blown into him
There was a house at the cul-de-sac
At the end of the space suburbs
The yard was well kept
And the sprinklers were on
And Captain James double checked
The coordinates on his space watch
And as the suns sank like cherries melting onto stars
Captain James cautiously crept in through the back door
And he heard the tv on
As he crept through the tiled kitchen
And as he looked through the door frame
There Roy was cuddled up
Next to a beautiful young human
Girl under a blanket
And as the screen hit their faces
Captain James had never seen
Two people so content
Just to be sitting together
Then captain James remembered
This was the evil demon he was after
So he entered the room
And he drew his weapon
The two turned their heads
And jumped back like little spiders
And then he told the young girl to move
So that he could put an end
To the space heroin epidemic
That plagues all the galaxies
But she did not listen
And just held him tightly in her arms
And with tears coming out of her eyes
She spoke with tremors in her voice
“He doesn’t peddle space heroin
He peddles space acid
And either way
Can’t you see? He’s a beautiful person”
James said, “Don’t let him put his demon spells
On your mind 'cause its young
And there’s things you don’t know
Now if you don’t move
I’ll have to shoot both
For I’ve chased this demon for years of my life”
But her rosy face didn’t flinch
She just held tighter onto him
So Captain James cocked his space gun
And he held it up
And said I’ll give you one more chance
To stand up and leave
But she showed no sign of any second thoughts
So he just aimed his gun
At both of their hearts
And blood trickled down
The back of the couch
And they both laid back dead
Like two little mice
Keeping each other warm
In the first chilling air of autumn
After summer flees
Captain James rolled into a space diner
And he ordered space coffee and pancakes
He lit up a space cigarette
And he read the space paper
And he just held the ring that he took
From Roy the space demon’s finger
He’s spacing out
He’s spacing out
Credits
Horse Bitch

Horse Bitch

About “Captain James” by Horse Bitch

Read the complete lyrics to "Captain James" by Horse Bitch in 2020. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Rock, Independent, Folk.

"Captain James" is performed by Horse Bitch. in 2020 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Captain James", explore more songs by Horse Bitch using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Captain James" is credited to Horse Bitch. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

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