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A Secretary Is Not a Toy Lyrics by Michael Park, Mary Faber, How To Succeed Company

How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying (2011 Broadway Cast Recording)

2011

[BRATT, spoken]
Gentlemen!
Gentlemen
[BRATT]
A secretary is not a toy
No, my boy, not a toy
To fondle and dandle
And playfully handle
In search of some puerile joy
No!
A secretary is not
Definitely not
A toy
[FIRST MAN, spoken]
You're absolutely right, Mr. Bratt
[SECOND MAN, spoken]
We wouldn't have it any other way, Mr. Bratt
[THIRD MAN, spoken]
It's a company rule, Mr. Bratt
[MEN]
A secretary is not a toy
No, my boy, not a toy
So do not go jumping for joy, boy
A secretary is not
A secretary is not
A secretary is not
A toy
[BRATT]
A secretary is not a pet
Nor an Erector Set
It happened to Charlie McCoy
[BRATT & MEN]
Boy, they fired him like a shot
The day the fellow forgot
A secretary is not
A toy
[WOMEN]
She's a highly specialized key component
Of operational unity
A fine and sensitive mechanism
To serve the office community
[SMITTY]
With a mother at home she supports
[BRATT]
And you'll find nothing like her at F.A.O. Schwarz
A secretary is not to be
Used for play therapy
Be good to the girl you employ, boy
Remember, no matter what
Neurotic trouble you've got
[BRATT & MEN]
A secretary is not
A toy
[WOMEN]
A secretary is not a thing
Wound by key, pulled by string
Her pad is to write in
And not spend the night in
If that's what you plan to enjoy
[WOMEN, spoken]
No
[BRATT & ENSEMBLE]
The secretary you got
Is definitely not
Employed to do a gavotte
Or you know what
Before you jump for joy
Remember this, my boy
A secretary is not
A Tinker Toy!
Credits
Michael Park

Michael Park

Mary Faber

Mary Faber

How To Succeed Company

How To Succeed Company

About “A Secretary Is Not a Toy” by Michael Park

Read the complete lyrics to "A Secretary Is Not a Toy" by Michael Park, Mary Faber, How To Succeed Company from the album "How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying (2011 Broadway Cast Recording)" in 2011. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Broadway, Musicals, Pop.

"A Secretary Is Not a Toy" is performed by Michael Park, Mary Faber, How To Succeed Company. from the album "How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying (2011 Broadway Cast Recording)" in 2011 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "A Secretary Is Not a Toy", explore more songs by Michael Park, Mary Faber, How To Succeed Company using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"A Secretary Is Not a Toy" is credited to Michael Park, Mary Faber, How To Succeed Company. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"A Secretary Is Not a Toy" appears on "How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying (2011 Broadway Cast Recording)" in 2011.

Visit the Michael Park, Mary Faber, How To Succeed Company artist page at /artist/michael-park for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.