[Intro: E. Farrell]
Hey, guys, it's Brett Michaels from VH1’s Rock of Love
Um, we're here at the iBatt-
Sorry, my selfie camera broke
We're here at the iBattle Corona Virus Tournament, about to get into this heated, uh, battle
The- between Dunsh and Brixx
They flipped a Sacagawea dollar, and...Brixx is going first
[Round 1: Brixx Belvy]
I’mma be honest...I put in this pot for an actual op
This shit is so lame…
I mean, a no-name woulda been better than yo' name
We could battle face-to-face, it won't change
Why take Belvedere when you coulda got Corona, and at least been sick for this home game?
You feel a way? Like you the G.O.A.T. to Brixx?
All them no-shows that you promo'd like you was focusin'
Disappointin' them little voices that gave you power
Well, you come from the right league
I mean, Lexx got you comin' out a do' to get socked: 2319
It’s funny, he’s like me, but he's nice...a worse Rone
But the Bible says “He without sin shall cast the first stone”
I catch this lawyer in his foyer, burst domes
Open cases everywhere...shit, it look like you takin’ your work home!
I burst chrome, wearin' 4X Ts!
Tuckin' slides, droppin' fo’s
You was droppin' a dose of acid like “What a ride!”
I watched you versus Mike and seen the extrovert come alive
Yeah, you was comin' off the top of yo' cocoon
Boom! Now he a social butterfly
Who's this guy? Bringin' up the Surf battle (*chuckles*)
But y'all can't play to your strengths
I mean, y'all watched Home Improvement, since the neighbor...it's quite a few lines to say in defense (the fence)
What you ‘bout 5'11”? They let you stretch it?
Well, make an attempt
Now you 6 feet - shoulda never gave him an inch
Boy, your fam' jump in? I'll wait...right before I send a slug in
Then soon as you go to make the donuts, I'mma be hittin' up Dun' kin (Dunkin')!
I swear to God!
[Round 1: Dunsh]
Yo, hold it down! That was trash
I said, I made a $10 cash deposit to expand my profits
I just copped a brand-new apartment and I'm poppin' like Asher Roth when he was back in college
You win the cash, then I'mma snatch your wallet
Straps goin' off
Let's see all that active (Aktive) talk after I tap your pockets!
[Dunsh’s GF]
Ow
[Dunsh]
Sorry
So just to recap, I just tapped his pockets
And obviously, I'm unscathed, so I'm- I'm winning slightly
I said, this kid's been a bum ever since he dipped from the S.O.N.S.
You were the one they all forgot about like Tiffany Trump
I got 99 problems and this bitch isn't one
And move like “99 Problems”: stashin' Brixx (bricks) in the trunk
I'm grippin' the pump, ‘bout to air metal like it's Twisted Sister
I'm chasin' Belvedere wit' the Remi' (Remy), and I ain't mixin' liquor
Finger-lickin' like a chicken dinner, and my bitch is thicker
Your girl call you “Little Richard” when you stick it in her!
I swear-
[Dunsh’s GF]
What the fuck? That's...that's not even how you rap
It's sexist
[Dunsh]
Okay, I know, but we've been through this, like, the 30th take
And I really need to get this in - it's like a half-hour before it's due
So can you please just let me get through it, please?
[Dunsh’s GF]
Alright, well- alright
It's also my apartment, but-
[Dunsh]
OK, can I have the camera? Thank you (Sure. Why not?)
I'm just gonna go in the other room
Thank you for your help
Yo, I said I'm the man of my household! (Keep it down!)
OK
(*in a voice just above a whisper*) I said I'm the man of my household
If your girl came at you, you'd be goin' silent like an oath of- oath of silence
I said, if your girl came at you, you'd be goin' quiet like an oath of silence
Yeah, I'm in a category with Stradivari: I'm known for violence
See, you sick, but you yesterday's news like the Ebola crisis
While I'm the type of sick you've never seen like-
Ahh, OK…
See, you sick, but you yesterday's news like the Ebola crisis
While I'm the type of sick you've never seen like the- fuck…
[Dunsh’s GF]
You're choking right now
[Dunsh]
No, I'm not - I'm gonna get it back
You sick-
[Dunsh’s GF]
I don't know. Maybe you should do another take-
[Dunsh]
Maybe you should shut the fuck up!
