[Intro]
[Non-Lyrical Vocals]
[*cough*]
[Verse 1: JASPER]
Thank god for Jay!
Honestly, without him I probably woulda been gay (Gay)
Never met a girl without his aid
I never copped a girl without his pain
Taught me that micro-cheating wasn't the way
I saw him, the first time on his birthday before St. James rolled around (Around)
Poured hot water on his head, he didn't drown (Drown)
But I was wondering why he walked out in a frown (Frown)
He preached me to the crowd, super loud, it was 7th grade (Loud)
I was camping his ass, 'fore Amber and him fell out (She's an asshole!)
And fore you know it, it happens in front of your eyes
I saw the look on her eyes when he said it in plain sight (He's an asshole, too!)
Yeah, Megan was the new target
But without him I never would have walked the red carpet to get to Amber
I knew she was dealing with a big platter
I approached with silence and for a while I was just a slacker
But he talked me through the whole thing
I never would have had confidence to tell 'em in the first place (First place)
That's why Jay's my first place
On my wedding he'll be first aid
And best man as well, if he's still laid (He's a fucking virgin!)
Fast forward, it's April 2023
Summer and him reto'd me for the biggest mistake (Fuck Michaela!)
After what happened how could you feel anything but hate
It's lighthearted, but when I think of it I ache
Say that again? thick of it?
I'm in the thick of it everybody knows
Just like Japeths in the thick of it with his nose
He looks like his heritage consists of buying kids and eating rope
If he has a number tied to him it'd be 54
Get it? Let it sink
How you gon reto me and marry kids
And then go reto her and marry shit
It looks like you did with that oiled-up hair and that silky afro and the black pair with the shaved asshole
Thank god for Jay!
'Cause without him I would've kept with Amber Jose
And without him, I would've never met VivionaPlayz
[Interlude: JatGPT]
Check it! Written by ChatGPT!
[Verse 2: JatGPT, JASPER]
Thank God for Jay, he pulled up in a sleigh
Reindeer iced out, eating crème brûlée
I was chilling with a duck, sipping Perrier
Then he showed me how to dunk on a kangaroo today
Oh snap, now I’m riding on a comet
Dropped my mixtape, now Saturn’s tryna cop it
Pluto hit me up, said the bars were outta pocket
I told him, “Blame Jay, he’s the plug in the socket”
Switch gears, now I’m cooking up spaghetti
Jay walks in with a toaster and machete
"Why the weapons?" He said, "Bruh, I’m getting ready
Aliens might pull up, and they’re petty, heavy sweaty"
I was like, “Say less,” threw on my Crocs
Jumped into a spaceship with a chicken and a fox
Hit hyperspeed, now we vibing on the rocks
On Mars eating tacos outta neon-colored box
Jay's the man, he's a vibe, he's a cyclone
Rapping through dimensions, got me dialin' on my iPhone
Flipping through realities, I'm lost, but I'm hype though
Jay in the back, eating fries with a rhinestone
Wait, hold up, now I’m swimming in some Jell-O
Met a jellyfish, dude's name was Carmello
He told me, "Life's sweet, but you gotta stay mellow,"
Then Jay showed up, riding a ukulele sello
What’s the move now? Bounce on the moon?
Jay said, “Nah, we’re building castles with spoons”
I said, “Cool,” now we’re racing in balloons
Threw a pie at the sun, now it's singing out of tune
Caught a vibe in the Bermuda Triangle
Jay doing math, solving cosmic angles
Aliens pull up, one of them’s named Randall
Asked me for a beat, so I handed them a bangle
Thank God for Jay, the legend, the myth
He’s out here flipping time like a clocksmith
When the world gets weird, he's the one I’m with
Jay's got the sauce, and it’s extra thick
Like thick of it, everybody knows!
Everybody knows
Jay's got the sauce, and it’s extra thick
Everybody knows
[Intermission]
Everybody knows?
Everybody knows?
Everybody knows?
Let me show you a new thing that everybody knows
According to the Philippines Statistics Authority, inflation slowed to 3.3% in August, down from 4.4% in July, which was driven by a decrease in overall food prices. Lower rice inflation, which dropped from 20.9% in July to 14.7% played a significant role in this trend. National Statistician Dennis Mapa expects rice inflation to fall to single digits this month due to base effects. The National Economic and Development Authority stated that the easing of inflation will benefit households, particularly low-income families. This trend is also expected to encourage consumer spending and stimulate economic activity, providing a considerable boost to businesses
[Outro]
Alright, thank you guys for coming today
Enjoy the rest of the synths, baby!
Stop fuckin' my girl dude
I said stop, stop!
Just don't do it inside please, no, no, no!
GUY: Dude, I can't wait to listen to this recording and it's just wind
