(Jeff Smith: 1st Verse)
I've been lied on, robbed, fired from my job
Been through the depths of hell wondering where is God?
If there's a heaven, and a power's that's so higher
Why babies die from gunshot wounds and house fires
Sometimes I hit the weed and just meditate
Could be ahead in life, if I ain't hesitate
Nearly losing my life for fake street resumes
Ashamed, probably why I smoke til I levitate
Tryna forget memories that bring nothing but misery
Suicidal thoughts, these flashbacks be killing me
Make me drink the Hennessey and mastermind the end of me
But I'll leave that in the hands of my enemies
They say everyone is born with a purpose
What happens when you're born feeling worthless
And insecure, in another 24 without Jack Bauer
Painful, would've been better off on a towel
Apparently, I'm a disappointment to my parents
My speculations caused me to stop caring
My heart stopped beating on a November evening
The day my grandma gave up and stopped breathing
Right after my last visit, and the news was heavy on my heart
Still a nigga had to get lifted
I loss control so how you think you controlling me nigga
You think you know but you don't know me like I know me nigga
(Hook)
The ups and downs, the highs and lows
Wasted time wondering where it go
Hiding my pain so the smiles will show
You clueless for sho, you shouldn't speak on things you don't know
I be singing the blues like (crooning)
I be singing the blues like (crooning )
(Jeff Smith: 2nd Verse)
I've been homeless, broke, suicidal and underpaid
I was more of a loose cannon in my younger days
Kept a lot of things hidden from my mama
My life was like a movie, I was addicted to drama
I pitched a little coke, I pitched a little weed
Even participated in a few B&E's
Being a follower lead me to bad places
But lucky me, I avoided death and catching cases
Another day to show my strength and my stamina
Never thought I'd see the day that I'll become a janitor
And I feel taken advantage of
They won't promote a nigga to full time so fuck being manager
I need benefits along with a bigger check
And moms wonder why I still smoke cigarettes
Sometimes I think I'm better dead off
Intoxicated late nights contemplating blowing my head off
Maybe I need a shrink, maybe I need a friend
Maybe I need a piece of Heaven just to breathe again
Cause mentally I was just in Hell
And happiness ain't for sell, gotta find it through self
I'm just a little nigga with a big heart
Life us a big show and I'm just playing my part
It took years for me to see the light standing in the dark
Giving it up is easy but surviving is hella hard
But what you know nigga
(Hook)
The ups and downs, the highs and lows
Wasted time wondering where it go
Hiding my pain so the smiles will show
You clueless for sho, you shouldn't speak on things you don't know
I be singing the blues like (crooning)
I be singing the blues like (crooning)
(Bless Picasso: 3rd Verse)
Yeah
You get a glimpse when you look through IG
But wasn't at the spital when I was hooked to IVs
Yo, but I salute my lady and my Gs
(One time) They showed love, that's the main ingredient
But let's really get into it, needed blood transfusions
So peace to those who kept me breathing
Look I had to raise babies, had to make sure granny won't freezing
So I pumped a little work and flipped my cash like a heathen
Let's go back, I'm from where sewing Gators on your Polo
Like B.I. was the number one 'No No'
My friends had the military fours, I was rocking Reeboks -- the Classics
But now I'm laughing while I'm cruising in a T-top
But at the time I had a complex
I seen the kids was fly but living in the projects
Let's fast forward, sophomore year caught up in beef with hoe niggas
Pig slammed me on a patrol car, go figure
Dropped out, hit the Commonwealth challenge with some kids I knew
Graduated early, couldn't fail and be miserable
Started getting serious with rap
Moms paid for the first few joints, she had my back
(That's love) Between time I had two seeds by two women
Six months apart that shows you how I was living
Look, I played my part for the better or the worse
Only the tip of the iceberg I could fit up in a verse
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