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Substitute Teacher Lyrics by Key & Peele

Season 2

2012

[Mr. Garvey]
All right, listen up y’all. I’m your substitute teacher Mr. Garvey, I taught school for 20 years in the inner city, so don’t even think about messing with me. You all feel me?
Okay, let’s take the roll here. Jakequaline, where’s Jakequaline at? No Jakequaline here? Yeah?
[Jacqueline]
Uh, do you mean, Jacqueline?
[Mr. Garvey]
Okay, so that’s how it’s going to be, you all want to play, okay then; I got my eye on you Jakequaline. Balakay, where is Balakay at? No, Balakay here today? Yes, sir?
[Blake]
My name is Blake.
[Mr. Garvey]
Are you out of your God damn mind? Blake? What? Do you want to go to war Balakay?
[Blake]
No.
[Mr. Garvey]
Because we couldn’t go to war?
[Blake]
No.
[Mr. Garvey]
I’m for real, I’m for real, so you better check yourself.
De-nice, is there a De-nice? If one of y’all say some silly ass name, this whole class is going to feel my wrath, now De-nice?
[Denise]
Do you mean Denise?
[Mr. Garvey]
Son of a bitch!
You say your name right, right now?
[Denise]
Denise.
[Mr. Garvey]
Say it right?
[Denise]
Denise.
[Mr. Garvey]
Correctly.
[Denise]
Denise.
[Mr. Garvey]
Right.
[Denise]
Denise.
[Mr. Garvey]
Right.
[Denise]
De-nice?
[Mr. Garvey]
That’s better, thank you.
Now a Ay-Ay-ron, where are you, where is a Ay-Ay-ron right now, no Ay-Ay-ron, huh? Oh, you better be sick, dead or mute, Ay-Ay-ron?
[Aaron]
Here. Oh man.
[Mr. Garvey]
Why didn’t you answer me the first time I said?
[Aaron]
Huh
[Mr. Garvey]
I’m just asking, I said it like four times, so why didn’t you say it the first time I said Ay-Ay-ron?
[Aaron]
Because it’s pronounced Aaron.
[Mr. Garvey]
Son of a bitch, you done messed up Ay-Ay-ron, now take your ass on down to O. Shag Hennessy’s office right now, and tell him exactly what you did.
[Aaron]
Who?
[Mr. Garvey]
O. Shag Hennessy.
[Aaron]
Principle O’Shaughnessy?
[Mr. Garvey]
Get out of my God damn classroom before I break my foot up in your ass.
Insubordinate and churlish.
Tim-mothy?
[Timothy]
Pre-sent.
[Mr. Garvey]
Thank you.
Credits
Key & Peele

Key & Peele

About “Substitute Teacher” by Key & Peele

Read the complete lyrics to "Substitute Teacher" by Key & Peele from the album "Season 2" in 2012. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Non-Music, Screen.

"Substitute Teacher" is performed by Key & Peele. from the album "Season 2" in 2012 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Substitute Teacher", explore more songs by Key & Peele using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Substitute Teacher" is credited to Key & Peele. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Substitute Teacher" appears on "Season 2" in 2012.

Visit the Key & Peele artist page at /artist/key-and-peele for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.