[Chorus: Billy D, Kyle Kombs]
I could take you to the store, buy you diamonds and gold
But first I gotta know, did I hit that right on the nose
Is you a catfish (A catfish)
Or is you a fat bitch? (A fat bitch)
I could, I could take you on the town, show you what I'm about
Put your butthole in my mouth, but first I gotta know right now
Is you a catfish (A catfish)
Or is you a fat bitch? (A fat bitch)
[Verse 1: Billy D]
Been talking to this girl online, yeah
We've been talking for some time, yeah
But something just don't feel right
Every time I call her on FaceTime
She never answers, she just declines
Pillow talking, telling me lies
Hopefully you're not a guy in disguise
'Cause we've had phone sex hundreds of times
Hopefully I'm not wasting my lifе
Facebook reactions, hearts and likеs
Met her on Tinder, I swiped right
Off on a bender, talked all night
I can't remember the last time I
Felt like this, fell for a chick I ain't even met yet
But I bet that I can make the bed spread
Wet like a septic tank
And I fantasize, and I masturbate
About me and you going state to state
Cum stains on a jet plane
Cocaine in my dick vein
I feel crazy, my heart race
Bought the tickets, and I set the date
Fuck it then, I done sealed my fate
Finna find out if you real or fake
[Chorus: Billy D, Kyle Kombs]
I could take you to the store, buy you diamonds and gold
But first I gotta know, did I hit that right on the nose
Is you a catfish (A catfish)
Or is you a fat bitch? (A fat bitch)
I could, I could take you on the town, show you what I'm about
Put your butthole in my mouth, but first I gotta know right now
Is you a catfish (A catfish)
Or is you a fat bitch? (A fat bitch)
[Verse 2: Kyle Kombs]
Shit, I met a girl on the internet, she said her name is Britney
Her face is cute with big old boobs, but boy I'm feeling iffy
And she never sends me videos, I'm trying to see them titties
But her real name's probably Brandon, I bet this dude weighs like three fifty
I'm like what's up with some FaceTime? Can I see your waist line?
She told me she's at work, but I know this bitch is straight lyin'
You frontin' with them model picks, I'm done with cyberdatin'
I was trippin' off suspicious 'til she dropped me her location
Now I'm on the way to her place with some flowers and some jimmies
She said she's on the front porch, and she's ready, just come get me
I called, but she don't answer, left a voicemail while I'm grinning
I'm in the whip right now, I can't wait to see you, Britney
[Chorus: Billy D, Kyle Kombs]
I could take you to the store, buy you diamonds and gold
But first I gotta know, did I hit that right on the nose
Is you a catfish (A catfish)
Or is you a fat bitch? (A fat bitch)
I could, I could take you on the town, show you what I'm about
Put your butthole in my mouth, but first I gotta know right now
Is you a catfish (A catfish)
Or is you a fat bitch? (A fat bitch)
[Verse 3: S.O.N]
I'm just lookin' through a screen, I tell 'em that my name is Stacy
Hi, it's nice to meet ya, wanna fuck me, maybe date me?
You can come right to my house, and you won't ever leave again
And I can have three dicks at once if I just wear your silver skin
We can dance the night away, Kyle dies while Billy cries
I can't lie, I've played this whole thing out like half a million times
You thought y'all were gonna choke and poke the thick bitch of your dreams
But now you're stuck inside a nightmare like The Human Centipede
I've got ya boofin' ketamine and Kyle wearin' little dresses
Make him look me in my eyes while Billy's butthole gets molested
You're my little silver guys, and we're together 'til the end
Now it puts the lotion on the skin or gets the hose again
[Chorus: Billy D, Kyle Kombs]
I could take you to the store, buy you diamonds and gold
But first I gotta know, did I hit that right on the nose
Is you a catfish (A catfish)
Or is you a fat bitch? (A fat bitch)
I could, I could take you on the town, show you what I'm about
Put your butthole in my mouth, but first I gotta know right now
Is you a catfish (A catfish)
Or is you a fat bitch? (A fat bitch)
[Skit]
So this is where the sick fuck lives
What did he do?
Word on the street is he's been acting like a lady online to lure guys to his house so he can capture them and then cut their dicks off
Yo, what?
We gotta go get this fuckin' guy
*knock knock knock*
Alright, Mr. Pancake, come out with your hands up, we're here to look around
This isn't Mr. Pancake, this is Britney
The gig is up, Mr. Pancake, we know it's you
Fine, but did you bring the search scroll?
Yes, we have the search warrant
Okay, fine, you may enter
Oh shit!
*chop*
No! No! No!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
*chop*
Shut the fuck up!
Yummy yummy foreskin om nom nom
