[Verse]
My heart is way too heavy
These tears could break a levy
As the world spins, my balance is more unsteady
I’m tired of Armageddon, hell’s fire is unrelenting
The music’s too loud, they playing the devil’s medley
I keep longing for the world like it used to be
The thought of losing those I love is all to new to me
I keep calling heaven’s customer service for a request
Like can I snap my fingers and put my demons to my rest
My nights are the longest, the storms are the loudest
My faith is the lowest, I’m losing my balance
I’ll rise up above it, if Jesus allow it
And turn the valleys of my soul into bountiful mountains
I feel death around the corner, I border on seeking boredom
In order to run away from the ghost in Lucifer’s forest
What’s justice, it doesn’t exist, neither does peace
How the soundtrack of my life became a requiem
I’m caught up in the cycle of hopin' it’s all a dream
And when I wake up, my heart will gain reprieve
But reality’s a tragedy, my journey is one chapter
The peace I seek in life, won’t be found 'til the after
I’m caught up in the rapture
Caught up in the feeling of longing holding me captive
Caught up in the feeling of hopin' I see the pastor
Spur a miracle that will live in the here and after
The here and after
[Interlude]
One feels, oh goodness I must face this thing calmly, bravely and not be in this panic. But the point of the fact is, you are in a panic. And you can't stop it. You can't do anything about it. This is when you finally realize you can't do anything about the death. You could have solved all that before by understanding you couldn't do anything about the panic
[Verse]
My faith is losing color, my demons are gaining numbers
When I’m close to freedom, I’m still so damn encumbered
There’s diamonds that's in the rough, the garbage is where I rummage
Even when I reach the top, I still plummet
I keep longing for the world like it used to be
Before this knife was at my neck like jewelry
Back when I would find amusement in Jerry and Tom’s foolery
Nintendo bliss, the beauty of what youth can be
Now the hue is grey, trying to fit in has got me feeling outta place
I’m scared I’ll live to die and I won’t even leave a trace
Expired and forgotten by the ones I tried to save
Excuse the pessimism man I hope it’s just a phase
That comes with knowing that your mortality is too fragile
Ninja stars coming my way I hope I’m agile
Bear traps all in my path along with landmines
Living without fear of the unknown is a pastime
All my ego does is point fingers and chastise
Told myself I wouldn’t self-loathe, antagonize
Always tell myself the last time was the last time
I’ve been heading straight for a meteor in a fast climb
I’ve been heading straight for a glacier and I’m past crying
Hoping I can steer the boat before I capsize
Hoping I can steer the boat before I capsize
Before I capsize
[Outro]
So you see this is always the opportunity presented by death: to give up, before you die. So that from your standpoint in that position, at that time, you would say, "I wouldn't have missed that opportunity for the world. Now I understand why we die." The reason we die is to give us the opportunity to understand what life's all about. By letting go. Because then we come to a situation that the ego can't deal with. When we are no longer hypnotized by that, then our natural consciousness can see clearly, what all this universe is for
