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Spanish Inquisition (Part 1) Lyrics by Monty Python

Another Monty Python Record

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Linkman: Jarrow - New Year's Eve 1911
Reg:
(Graham) Trouble at mill
Lady Mountback:
(Carol) Oh no - what kind of trouble?
Reg: I don't know - Mr Wentworth told me to come and say that there was trouble at the mill, that's all - I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition
[JARRING CHORD]
(The door flies open and Cardinal Ximinez of Spain enters, flanked by two junior cardinals. Cardinal Biggles has goggles pushed over his forehead. Cardinal Fang is just Cardinal Fang)
Ximinez:
(Michael) NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! Our weapon is suprise...surprise and fear...fear and surprise.... Our two weapons are fear and surprise...and ruthless efficiency.... Our three weapons are fear, and surprise, and the ruthless efficiency...and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope.... Amongst our weapons...are fear, surprise, ruth... Amongst our weaponry...are such elements as fear... I'll come in again
(Exit and exeunt)
Reg: I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition
[JARRING CHORD]
(The cardinals burst in)

Ximinez: NOOOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! Amongst our weaponry are such diverse elements as: fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency, and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope, and a night out with the neighbour - Oh erh! It's no good, I'm sorry. Cardinal Biggles - you'll have to say it
Biggles:
(Terry J) What?
Ximinez: You'll have to say the bit about 'Our chief weapons are ...'
Biggles: I couldn't say that...
(Ximinez bundles the cardinals outside again)
Reg: I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition
[JARRING CHORD]
(The cardinals enter)
Biggles: Er.... Nobody...um....
Ximinez: Expects...
Biggles: Expects... Nobody expects the...um...Spanish...um...
Ximinez: Inquisition
Biggles: Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition. In fact, those who do expect -
Ximinez: Our chief weapons is...
Biggles: Our chief weapons is...um...er...
Ximinez: Surprise...
Biggles: Surprise and --
Ximinez: Stop. Stop. Stop there - All right! All right! ...our chief weapon is surprise...blah blah blah blah blah. Now, Cardinal Fang, read the charges
Fang:
(Terry G) One pound for a full sketch, 24 p for a quickie
Ximinez: What will you have?
Lady Mountback: Sketch, please

About “Spanish Inquisition (Part 1)” by Monty Python

Read the complete lyrics to "Spanish Inquisition (Part 1)" by Monty Python from the album "Another Monty Python Record". On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Pop.

"Spanish Inquisition (Part 1)" is performed by Monty Python. from the album "Another Monty Python Record" This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Spanish Inquisition (Part 1)", explore more songs by Monty Python using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Spanish Inquisition (Part 1)" is credited to Monty Python. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Spanish Inquisition (Part 1)" appears on "Another Monty Python Record".

Visit the Monty Python artist page at /artist/monty-python for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.


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