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“Billy Collins’s ”The History Teacher”” Lyrics by MsU

MsUIBPoetryIntro

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Trying to protect his students' innocence
he told them the Ice Age was really just
the Chilly Age, a period of a million years
when everyone had to wear sweaters.
And the Stone Age became the Gravel Age,
named after the long driveways of the time.
The Spanish Inquisition was nothing more
than an outbreak of questions such as
"How far is it from here to Madrid?"
"What do you call the matador's hat?"
The War of the Roses took place in a garden,
and the Enola Gay dropped one tiny atom on Japan.
The children would leave his classroom
for the playground to torment the weak
and the smart,
mussing up their hair and breaking their glasses,
while he gathered up his notes and walked home
past flower beds and white picket fences,
wondering if they would believe that soldiers
in the Boer War told long, rambling stories
designed to make the enemy nod off.
Credits
MsU

MsU

About ““Billy Collins’s ”The History Teacher””” by MsU

Read the complete lyrics to "“Billy Collins’s ”The History Teacher””" by MsU from the album "MsUIBPoetryIntro". On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Non-Music, Literature.

"“Billy Collins’s ”The History Teacher””" is performed by MsU. from the album "MsUIBPoetryIntro" This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "“Billy Collins’s ”The History Teacher””", explore more songs by MsU using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"“Billy Collins’s ”The History Teacher””" is credited to MsU. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"“Billy Collins’s ”The History Teacher””" appears on "MsUIBPoetryIntro".

Visit the MsU artist page at /artist/msu for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.