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Cool Down Willard Lyrics by Ray Stevens

Crackin’ Up!

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Cool down, Willard (Cool down)
You're just too hot for the farm
I said, cool down, Willard (Cool down)
You gotta throttle back on the charm
Yeah, my wife and my grandma and my aunt May
Go wild when you wave your toupee
I said, cool down, Willard (Cool down)
You're just too hot for the farm

Well, I'm up every morning at the crack of dawn
But my wife's already up and got the TV on
Just sittin' there, starin' at the test pattern
You can't budge her from that spot
She's waitin' for that early morning Today Show
With that sexy weatherman, her superhero
Old debonair, devil-may-care Willard Scott

"Oh, Willard, you're just the sweetest thing"
"Now sit down, grandma, and put your teeth back in
You're drooling all in your cream of wheat"
"Oh, Willard"

Now grandma just ain't been the same
Since her last birthday when Willard mentioned her name
Right there on coast-to-coast TV
Why, we had to step up her medication
And the wife don't cook nor clean the home
She's talkin' all day on the telephone
'Bout what Willard said, what Willard wore
Why, it's a serious situation

Said, cool down, Willard (Cool down)
You're just too hot for the farm
Cool down, Willard (Cool down)
You gotta throttle back on the charm
Now there's just so much these women can take
You're the hottest thing to ever hit Wild Lake
I said, cool down, Willard (Cool down)
You're just too hot for the farm

"Oh, here I am, Willard"
"Come and take me, you handsome hunk"
"Now grandma, don't get yourself all riled up"
"Come on, Willard"
"Grandma, what have you got on?"

Now grandma ain't been acting like she should
Since she rode off to Frederick's of Hollywood
She just puts on her little outfit
And waits for Mister Excitement with the boutonnière
The whole darn thing has just gone too far
Why, they've even started talkin' 'bout gettin' a VCR
So they can watch Willard 24 hours a day
I tell you, it just ain't fair

Cool down, Willard (Cool down)
Why, this is worse than Elvis, or the Beatles
Cool down, Willard (Cool down)
Yeah, the way these women are just throwing themselves at this man
What is it gonna take to get somebody to help me with the chores?
Cool down, Willard (Cool down)
I mean, I'm out here working my fingers to the bone
Cool down, Willard (Cool down)
Milking the cows, slopping the hogs
Cool down, Willard (Cool down)
Feedin' them chickens, I'm sick of this
I tell you, Willard, I'm out here killing myself
And these women are all piled up in the bed there watchin' you on TV
Cool down, Willard (Cool down)
Cavorting around and trampling with their affection
I tell you, Willard
Willard
(Cool down)
Credits
Ray Stevens

Ray Stevens

About “Cool Down Willard” by Ray Stevens

Read the complete lyrics to "Cool Down Willard" by Ray Stevens from the album "Crackin’ Up!". On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Pop.

"Cool Down Willard" is performed by Ray Stevens. from the album "Crackin’ Up!" This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Cool Down Willard", explore more songs by Ray Stevens using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

View all songs and biography for Ray Stevens · Trending lyrics · Billboard Hot 100

Frequently asked questions

"Cool Down Willard" is credited to Ray Stevens. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Cool Down Willard" appears on "Crackin’ Up!".

Visit the Ray Stevens artist page at /artist/ray-stevens for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.

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