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The Quarantine Song Lyrics by Ray Stevens

Ain’t Nothin’ Funny Anymore

2020

[Verse 1]
I wash my hands, I don't touch my face
Stay at home, shelter in place
Keep my social distance, don't go to work
I wear a mask and gloves and I, I stay away from church
I avoid old folks and should I sneeze
I do it in my elbow or up my sleeve
Stay six feet apart, that is my rule
And I pray for the day the kids go back to school

[Chorus]
I'm washing my hands like a raccoon with OCD
I've watched Hulu, Roku, Netflix, PBS and BBC
I've taken down all my mirrors 'cause I'm sick of what I see
Two more weeks of quarantine will be the death of me (The death of me)

[Verse 2]
I risk a trip to the grocery store
Just to buy T.P. and a few things more
But when I get there, all I can find
Is sixteen honey buns and some Mad Dog wine

[Chorus]
I'm washing my hands like a raccoon with OCD
I've watched Hulu, Roku, Netflix, PBS and BBC
I've taken down all my mirrors 'cause I'm sick of what I see
Yeah, two more weeks of this quarantine's gonna be the death of me (The death of me)

[Outro]
You know, they say this is war
But we don't have to storm Omaha Beach or Pork Chop Hill
We just lay here on the sofa and watch TV
I'd rather volunteer for a high-risk Commando raid to parachute into Wuhan
And find that fellow that ordered that bat soup, yeah
I know I'm talking out of my head, saying crazy stuff over and over
Like "Yes, dear, yes, dear"
The other morning at breakfast
I meant to say "Honey, would you please pass the pepper?"
But what slipped out was "You crazy woman, you've ruined my life!"
Of course I immediately apologized, just as soon as I woke up

About “The Quarantine Song” by Ray Stevens

Read the complete lyrics to "The Quarantine Song" by Ray Stevens from the album "Ain’t Nothin’ Funny Anymore" in 2020. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Country.

"The Quarantine Song" is performed by Ray Stevens. from the album "Ain’t Nothin’ Funny Anymore" in 2020 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "The Quarantine Song", explore more songs by Ray Stevens using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

View all songs and biography for Ray Stevens · Trending lyrics · Billboard Hot 100

Frequently asked questions

"The Quarantine Song" is credited to Ray Stevens. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"The Quarantine Song" appears on "Ain’t Nothin’ Funny Anymore" in 2020.

Visit the Ray Stevens artist page at /artist/ray-stevens for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.


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