[Chorus]
\n
\nI held you in high regards, a pedestal couldn’t yield you more fondness
\nAnd the sheer fact we were even in conjunction left me astonished
\nTo ascertain that this sentiment was not commissioned in your end
\nHeavied my conscience with a tauntin’ discontent
\nYou seem to recollect the ways in which we bonded as undiluted nonsense
\nAnd me just as a common correspondence
\nAlthough I was despondent
\nI had to be honest
\nAnd admit there were times where I didn’t even try to think of what she wanted
\nMy thoughts held an infatuation
\nTo the concept of love and, in turn, I burdened you with the responsibility of fulfillin’ all my wildest imaginations
\nIn the grand scheme of things, our relations were of a brief duration
\nBut what was forsaken in your departure was a lifetime’s worth of rearrangement
\n
\n[Verse]
\n
\nI used to subscribe to the notion that winnin’ your affection would persist at the summit of the list of all my biggest achievements
\n‘Cause my self-esteem was depleted
\nThere were many a nights where I examined the abyss of my soul and located a brand new grievance
\nWho I wanted to be and who I was were within a disagreement
\nWith your presence, I was afforded the convenience
\nOf neglectin’ concerns of my self-image and state of depression that left me at my weakest
\nBut I couldn’t’ve been doing too bad since once upon a time, you said loved me and that wasn’t for no reason
\nI couldn’t love myself, so you doin’ it for me was everything I needed
\nAnd then you couldn’t do it no mo’
\nI couldn’t use you an excuse no mo’
\nThe existential torture resumed, and I could not evade the music no mo’
\nI enjoy being a hopeless romantic and my childhood conveyed to me
\nThat this frame of mind, I would prefer to not have it any other way for me
\nBut appraisingly, I was not fond of all the other things it made me be
\nSensitivity was innate for me
\nAnd thinkin’ was my greatest feat
\nSo when tragedy struck my real life, not even my own mind was a safe place for me
\nEven the most mundane of affairs were particularly adept at phasin’ me
\nIn addition, this inkling of isolation stayed with me, pervasively
\nIt felt like I was travelin’ the pits of hell by myself the way there was no one around that could relate with me
\nA query that kept my state of peace at bay for weeks
\nWas would I ever reach the light at the end of the tunnel or would the despair that’s always chasin’ me
\nSomeday have its way with me, fatally
\nFor a long time, it appeared like that light was gettin’ further and further away from me
\nI put the less hope in hopeless romantic
\nBecause I thought there was no savin’ me
\nUntil one day, I realized the light in the distance that was getting’ away from me
\nWas only my memories of you holding less sway to me
\nAnd to someone who’s been walkin’ blindly in the dark for so long, that was a grace to see
\nSee, they say that absence makes the heart grow fonder
\nBut time, time takes us further away from the places that harmed us
\nAbsence and time withers away the hold that old memories have upon us
\nUntil is it but a husk of its former glory that can lend its input no longer
\nAll the li’l details started gettin’ hazy
\nYou stopped crossin’ my thoughts on the daily
\nIt was best thing in the world when my time with you was only somethin’ I could recall very vaguely
\nAnd with all that time I spent reflectin’ in solitude
\nI attained a new comprehension of my composition and put it in proper use
\nSelf-expression, I used my sorrow to
\nMake art that were personal confessions and find acceptance with how I felt then because I’m not taboo
\nI fancied myself a hopeless romantic, because that’s what I thought was true
\nBut I learned that you can’t truly love someone else
\nWhen you don’t love yourself
\nBecause they’ll always deserve more than what you can offer them when all of you is not even alot to you\n\n
