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Cover Art

Weasel Lyrics by Slow Gherkin

Double Happiness

0

I bought them just a week ago. I thought they'd make good pets
But all they do is chew on me and smoke my cigarettes
My house is trashed, my scooter crashed, my Sunday suit is ruined--
Not to mention my white boy hide is one big open wound
My extremities are dismembered, and my poor old face is cut
And now here comes those razor teeth--they're lunging for my butt!
They drink my Beck's, they fry on X, and all they do is rave
So one day I got sick of them, and I threw them in the goddamn microwave
Skankin' weasel, skankin' weasel! Weasel, weasel!
I turned the knob to "super high" and pressed the button "cook."
But then I saw the cord chewed through, and then the weasel booked
He darted in the kitchen and into the living room
I ran after him throwing knives and swinging my old broom
I swang and swang but did not hit--the weasel was too fast
So I got out my pocket knife and I hit one in the ass
Finally got a hold of one--the death sentence was dealt
I popped him in the pressure cooker and watched him slowly melt
Credits
Slow Gherkin

Slow Gherkin

About “Weasel” by Slow Gherkin

Read the complete lyrics to "Weasel" by Slow Gherkin from the album "Double Happiness". On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Pop.

"Weasel" is performed by Slow Gherkin. from the album "Double Happiness" This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Weasel", explore more songs by Slow Gherkin using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Weasel" is credited to Slow Gherkin. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Weasel" appears on "Double Happiness".

Visit the Slow Gherkin artist page at /artist/slow-gherkin for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.