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The Happiest Boy Lyrics by The Bedroom Philosopher

Brown and Orange

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When I was thirteen
I was abducted by aliens
In a sunset orange
Valiant with wings
The aliens were friendly
They communicated by break dancing
They looked like a cross
Between Gumby, Bjork and Richie Benaud
They took me to their home planet
Mars_79
It had an iced vovo surface
And a lynx java atmosphere
They sterilised me with towellettes
Fed me condensed milk through a tube
Gave me an interactive pamphlet
And teleported all but my pants
And I was the happiest boy out of this world
The architecture on mars_79 was inspired by the spirograph
They had no words for war
And fifty six words for funk
Their main source of economy
Was teaching break dancing as a second language
Mainly to interplanetary students
Cos that’s where all the money is
The aliens were progressive
They believed in sex before breakfast
They paid for stuff in hugs
And gave change in kickboxing
They used trampoline energy
And kept sideburns as pets
And thought flossing a religious experience so they didn’t go to church much
And I was the happiest boy out of this world
Then they began their experiments on me
Probing me with questions about TV
Home and away they wanted to know if Aisla had died
Cos they were nine seasons behind
X-files they wanted to know if Mulder and Scully had smooched
And how they got a documentary to look so well produced
I could not speak
I acted dumb
Did I mention I had an instrument up my bum?
Flute
The aliens apologised
They break danced with tears in their eyes
They offered to erase my memories of the trip
And take me home in a bit
But I pleaded with them to keep all my memories of them
And erase all my memories of TV shows
And I was the happiest boy in this world
Credits
The Bedroom Philosopher

The Bedroom Philosopher

About “The Happiest Boy” by The Bedroom Philosopher

Read the complete lyrics to "The Happiest Boy" by The Bedroom Philosopher from the album "Brown and Orange". On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Pop.

"The Happiest Boy" is performed by The Bedroom Philosopher. from the album "Brown and Orange" This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "The Happiest Boy", explore more songs by The Bedroom Philosopher using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"The Happiest Boy" is credited to The Bedroom Philosopher. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"The Happiest Boy" appears on "Brown and Orange".

Visit the The Bedroom Philosopher artist page at /artist/the-bedroom-philosopher for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.