[Intro]
(Is it snowing outside yet?)
[Verse]
Welcome to Epstein's Christmas
Got me wishing you a merry motherfucking list-mas
R Kelly got me wishing you a merry piss-mas
"Fuck with girls that turn to boys", flip it 'round and you got yourself a merry Ava Kris-mas
Make your girl finish so quick, McQueen like Lightning
Kachow on my dick, let's hope there's no biting
Like it's an ear and she's bloody Mike Tyson, yeah
[Chorus]
It's Christmas time
Hear the jingle bells chime
I'm gonna fucking slay like Santa Claus
When he clobbers those elves in the jaws
Gets your girl on all fours
Like she's got fucking paws
In the UK, it always pours
[Verse]
It's always pouring
Wakе up on a Christmas morning
Is that Santa snoring?
That's those sleeping pills I poured in
I put some morе in
Looking through his sacks, I'm sorting
Next morning, book a plane
Hear my name and now I'm soaring
Exploring Santa's crib, curbstomp an elf and now they saw me
Ignore me, new dictator
I'm priceless, they can't afford me
Applaud the new leader
Shoot up these elves 'cause they annoy me
One death for each of my woes
One elf for each of my toes
Like a draft with these elves I chose
For the gifts, only sexual things go
I'm inclusive, him, she or them
Like phlegm always stuck in their throat
Kidnap any humans under five foot four, put them in the factory crew
Whilst the rest of us party, I even brought male strippers for the women too
And maybe for Taylor too
And maybe for myself too
I want a policeman too
For Taylor, we'll make it two
Mrs Claus always said she wanna have a go on a special helicopter ride
Endless parties, we sleep hardly
Expect no presents on Christmas time
[Chorus]
It's Christmas time
Hear the jingle bells chime
I'm gonna fucking slay like Santa Claus
When he clobbers those elves in the jaws
Gets your girl on all fours
Like she's got fucking paws
In the UK, it always pours
[Bridge]
Decked Santa in the face
So, like a Minecraft youtuber, I'm catching a case
Oh, don't you like my pace?
I'll smack you with a mace
Leave a fucking bad taste
Get your drugs like your shoes
How you like 'em laced
All these Christmas songs have been kinda based
Only show the real talent once a year, what a waste
First two lines of the chorus, copy and paste, yeah
[Chorus]
It's Christmas time
Hear the jingle bells chime
I'm gonna fucking slay like Santa Claus
When he clobbers those elves in the jaws
Gets your girl on all fours
Like she's got fucking paws
In the UK, it always pours
[Verse]
Lights on the tree, yeah, they're shining so bright
Candles in the window, it's a cosy night
Stockings hanging high, presents on the floor
Laughter in the air as we open the door
The smell of cookies baking, fills up the room
Carols in the background, under the moon
It's a time for joy, a time to share
Christmas magic, you can feel it everywhere, yeah, yeah
Oh, Christmas time, let the bells ring loud
Joy and love in every crowd
Feel the cheer, let the season shine
It's Christmas time, let the world feel fine
[Chorus]
It's Christmas time
Hear the jingle bells chime
I'm gonna fucking slay like Santa Claus
When he clobbers those elves in the jaws
Gets your girl on all fours
Like she's got fucking paws
In the UK, it always pours
[Verse]
So, I'ma make it rain on Mrs Claus
'Cause I got some elves to do the chores
Make sure the North Pole got different laws
'Cause I'm about to start some fucking wars
Red snow coats the fucking floors
Santa's grotto's where Santa's shot slow
So I get all the presents elves are making, bro
'Cause I'm making dough
While I make this flow
So I ain't gonna mess up
No, I ain't gonna throw
Never gonna run out of motherfucking ammo
And I'm gonna fucking blow their brains out if they stop
