[Verse 1]
They say that love is an illusion, an open door, or somewhere in between
For some reason, love has always been a battlefield for me
I tried to find someone, but I keep finding shit for me to learn from
Guess each relationship is like the school I never (finished)
I’ve had my share of ups and downs, but this latest one’s the hardest
A story so daunting, I don’t know where to start
It was the 21st night of October
Out the blue, she texted me and told mе that it’s over
(What the fuck?)
In a flash, you werе part of my past
One minute, I’m sleeping, next one, I’m screaming in pain
Why would you leave me this way?
Say you don’t love me the same
Say you can’t be what I need
How that make sense in your brain?
Nah
It’s gotta be deeper, I don’t believe what you say
That’s half the reason why we stand in this position today
I don’t where the lies end and truth begins
Way you reality bend’s, beyond what I can comprehend
I tried to make sense of it, made excuses for you
Friends told me to dip from it
I knew that you was lying, wish I knew the extent of it
I’ll prolly never know it all, crazy I helped you out the mud
You let me slip and fall
What’s even crazier is, I’d answer if you’d ever call
And If you wanted me again, I’d prolly risk it all
And end up right where I began
Lonely, scarred, and ashamed
I gave all of my love and I took all of the pain
Make no mistake, I’m not gone say that I’m without my blame
I made mistakes that led me straight into this troglodytic fate
Oh, yeah, I lied and I did my little drive-bys
Kinda ironic cause that’s all I was in your life
Simply a drive by, something to pass the time
Till you found you the perfect guy
Happy to see you smile, but fuck, it sucks to be tossed aside
I’m stuck and there’s no denying
I’ll love you to end of times
I know that you’re gone forever , but yet my heart still desires you
Hope that I heal soon
If not I’ll probably OD on this bottle of pills soon
Jump off of a bridge, reunite wit Ty real soon
I know I get dramatic, prolly why you sent me packing
I don’t blame you, when I see me in the mirror, wanna blast him
This shit was bound to happen
I’ve sinned so much that I can never truly repent from it
Loving you was hell on earth, from which you were sent from it
Bet you get a kick from it
I bet that you laugh at my pain
Know that you’re someone else’s love, damn you win again
It’s clear the love you had for me was a facade and feigned
Why were you so ashamed?
Fuck being in the picture, I was never in the frame
You moved on so quickly, found love so easily
Happiness was a breeze, for you, but I’m still bleeding
I never was enough to fill your cup, but I kept trying to pour more
Thought this was a two seater, didn’t know your love was a four dour
You said don’t worry bout him, ‘cause he’s just friend
But I ain’t dumb, I knew right then, you’d found another man
You gave him everything I begged for, love out in the open
Happy that you got your fix, guess you were right to leave me broken
And if we never speak again, I hope you know I’m sorry
That I burdened you with all my flaws, I’m glad you got to start again
She’ll prolly never hear this, if she does she won’t care
But regardless, this my method of therapy
October 21st
[Phone Call]
(Didn’t necessarily know how to handle it in a voice conversation
So that’s also probably why I sent a text message)
(You deserve more, or better, pr at least more than I’m able to give you
I don’t have anything left to give)
(It’s clear that we think very differently about a lot of things)
(I’m not doing you a favor)
She’s not doing you a favor
(I’m more so releasing you before I hurt you)
She’s moreso releasing you before she hurts you
