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Lettuce Lyrics by Saturday Night Live

SNL Digital Shorts

2005

[Tag (over the black screen): "An SNL Digital Short"]
[Dissolve to the exterior, apartment building. Pan down to stoop, where Andy sits glumly until Will appears from right and sits beside him]
WILL: Hey.
ANDY: Hey.
WILL: I got your message. I'm so sorry.
ANDY: Thanks. I just keep trying to tell myself he's in a better place, you know?
WILL: Hey, you know, it's all right to feel sad. But the pain goes away. [Holds up a head of lettuce and takes a bite]
ANDY: Yeah. I just wish there was a way to make it go away faster. [Also holds up a lettuce and takes a bite]
WILL: I wish it would, too, bro. I wish it would, too. [Bites into his lettuce]
ANDY: Every time the phone rings, I keep thinking it's going to be him, you know? And then I remember. [Bites into his lettuce]
WILL: It's okay. Lеt it out. [Bites into his lettuce ]
ANDY: [His mouth full of lеttuce as he speaks] I must look like such an idiot.
WILL: Why? Because you care about something, and you're not afraid to show it? That's not an idiot. That's a hero.
ANDY: What did I do to deserve you? [Bites into his lettuce]
WILL: [Bites into his lettuce] You treated me like a friend.
ANDY: I don't know what to say. [Bites into his lettuce]
WILL: Sometimes, you don't need to say anything.
[They continue to bite into their heads of lettuce together, as a stranger walks past from the left, also biting into a head of lettuce]
ANNOUNCER: Through good times and bad–lettuce.
[Cut to product graphic, with tag: "Paid for by the United Lettuce Growers Association"]
[Fade]
Credits
Saturday Night Live

Saturday Night Live

About “Lettuce” by Saturday Night Live

Read the complete lyrics to "Lettuce" by Saturday Night Live from the album "SNL Digital Shorts" in 2005. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Skit, Non-Music, Comedy.

"Lettuce" is performed by Saturday Night Live. from the album "SNL Digital Shorts" in 2005 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Lettuce", explore more songs by Saturday Night Live using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Lettuce" is credited to Saturday Night Live. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Lettuce" appears on "SNL Digital Shorts" in 2005.

Visit the Saturday Night Live artist page at /artist/saturday-night-live for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.