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When the House Is Dark and Quiet Lyrics by Barry Louis Polisar

My Brother Thinks He’s a Banana and Other Provocative Songs for Children

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Late at night when Mommy and Daddy have gone out
Me and my brother get to scream and jump and shout
'Cause the house is dark and quiet and we're left all alone
With another teen-age baby-sitter talking on the phone
We tip-toe on our tip-toes and we listen to her laugh
While the water is running, so she thinks we're in the bath
She tells her friend she's hungry, so we know just how to tease her;
We go and get the kitty cat and hide it in the freezer
Cindy opens up the door, you should have seen her leap
Then we tell her, "That's the place where the kitty always sleeps."
She starts yelling and sends us both to bed
But Tim and me don't listen to a single thing she's said
Convinced that Tim and I are finally lying sound asleep
She settles on the sofa and turns on the TV
So Tim sneaks to the basement to disconnect the fuse
While I'm up in the attic, thumping in my father's shoes
While Cindy checks the TV set, examining the plug
I crawl across the living room, underneath the rug
We stand up on the sofa with carrots up our noses
Pretending we are monsters--not wearing any clothes-es
Cindy says she won't come back, just like Mike and Sue
Melody and Barbara, John and Linda, too
Mom and Dad can't leave us now, although they feel they must
But we can't understand why no one wants to stay with us
Credits
Barry Louis Polisar

Barry Louis Polisar

About “When the House Is Dark and Quiet” by Barry Louis Polisar

Read the complete lyrics to "When the House Is Dark and Quiet" by Barry Louis Polisar from the album "My Brother Thinks He’s a Banana and Other Provocative Songs for Children". On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Pop.

"When the House Is Dark and Quiet" is performed by Barry Louis Polisar. from the album "My Brother Thinks He’s a Banana and Other Provocative Songs for Children" This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "When the House Is Dark and Quiet", explore more songs by Barry Louis Polisar using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"When the House Is Dark and Quiet" is credited to Barry Louis Polisar. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"When the House Is Dark and Quiet" appears on "My Brother Thinks He’s a Banana and Other Provocative Songs for Children".

Visit the Barry Louis Polisar artist page at /artist/barry-louis-polisar for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.