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Awkward Rap Lyrics by CollegeHumor

2008

[SAM]
A 1, 2, 3, 4--
[DAN]
W-wait, when do I come in?
[SAM]
You come in after "4."
[DAN]
So on "5"?
[SAM]
Yes, but I'm not gonna say "5."
I'm not gonna say "5..."
[DAN]
OK
[SAM]
You have to come in at "4."
Alright, 1, 2, 3, 4, now!
[DAN]
If you say, "How are you?"
I'll say "Not much."
My hand and your boob
Accidentally touch
I snort when I laugh
And I fart when I sneeze
Stand right behind this guy
When he pees
If I see you wavin'
My hand goes in the air
Even though you're wavin'
To that guy over there
I talk shit about you
Like a sly fox
'Til I realize that I wrote it
In your I.N. box
When a waiter says
"Enjoy your food"
Every single time I will say
"Oh, you too"
I mean it, yo
Have a seat next to me
Pour yourself a cup
Of my dig-
[SAM]
-ni-
[AMIR]
-ty-y!
[DAN]
How is your boyfriend?
You two really click
Oh, you broke up?
That guy was a dick
'Scuse me, I cannot
Reach the top rack
Oh, you don't work here
You're just black?
[Chorus]
Awkward!
When will this moment pass?
Awkward!
I feel like such an ass!
Awkward!
It makes my skin crawl!
Awkward!
Yo, yo, it makes me feel so small!
[SAM]
When I see you
I give you a quizzical look
Do I know you from life
Or from Facebook?
You're far away
And cause we can't talk yet
We'll act like our eyeballs
Never met
When we talk
I gotta hide my shame
You think we're B.F.F's
But I don't know your name
So here we in are no-
[AMIR]
-Man's-
[DAN]
-Land!
[SAM]
Do I give you a hug
Or just shake your hand?
I go for the embrace
So warm and pleasin'
You try to pull away
But I keep on squeezin'
You try to pass by
But we bump and sway
Heh, thanks for the dance
I'll be on my way
We said our goodbyes
And I shed a tear
Miss you already
Wha--, you're still here!
I want to avoid
Further social connection
So I walk twenty minutes
In the wrong direction
[Chorus]
Awkward!
When will this moment pass?
Awkward!
I feel like such an ass!
Awkward!
You think it can't get worse?
Awkward!
Yo, yo! But we've got one more verse
[AMIR]
On the elevator ride
You want to impose
I say I'm pressin' "open"
But I press "door close"
If you make it in
I will devise
A way to look everywhere
But in your eyes
Then I follow you
Right out the door
Take a look around
This ain't my floor
Ring goes ya' phone
So put it to your cheek
I didn't mean to call you
But now we gotta speak
One last thing
When my voice gets loud
And there's suddenly silence
In the crowd
I don't care
Won't change what I say
All these people
Are dicks anyway-y!
[WOMAN]
What?
[AMIR]
What?... were you? This guy was all like--
[DAN]
Just don't...
[AMIR]
No, I do not think you guys are dicks anyway... no way. He w-- I don't know-- was super...
Look-- have you guys looked at the walls? What are color are they, like, they... awkward-marine? He he. Ahhhl. When's daylight savings? That's spring forward...?
[SAM]
Fall back
[AMIR]
It's June. Fall back... it's...
Credits
CollegeHumor

CollegeHumor

About “Awkward Rap” by CollegeHumor

Read the complete lyrics to "Awkward Rap" by CollegeHumor in 2008. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Comedy, Rap.

"Awkward Rap" is performed by CollegeHumor. in 2008 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Awkward Rap", explore more songs by CollegeHumor using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Awkward Rap" is credited to CollegeHumor. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

Album information for "Awkward Rap" is not available in our database yet. You can still read the full lyrics on this page.

Visit the CollegeHumor artist page at /artist/collegehumor for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.