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Patrick’s Chirstmas Poem [Untitled] Lyrics by Episode One

Christmas poems

2021

Basically one Christmas I was stuck in my room
Because I got grounded for calling my mom a bitch
When I was in my room I saw Santa and he was on my roof
And he was looking through the neighbor's window
And watching the kids watch Lilo and Stitch
I poked my head out the window and said
"Hey Santa, what the hell are you doing watching the neighbor's kids watch a movie?"
He looked at me and got too scared that he slid down the roof
Because of the ice and he fell off the roof
And hit his head on every window in the building
And then hit his head on the ground
And his brains made a smoothie
Thеn, my neighbors pit bulls came over
And startеd eating the chunks of Santa's brain
And started ripping out Santa's throat
So I snuck downstairs with a sledgehammer
And I started beating the fucking crap out of Santa with the sledgehammer so that it was easier for the dogs to eat his fat belly
And then the police came and they gave me a medal because they found out it was a fake Santa
And it was a pedophile named Robin Baskins
And then the real Santa flew by on his sleigh and gave me a thumbs up
And under the tree next morning I got Star Wars Micro Machines Rogue One Death Star 2 Action Set
And Star Wars Micro Machines Chewbacca Endor Action Set
And Star Wars Micro Machines Storm Trooper/Death Star Action Set And Nike Air Pippens
And Levi's Corduroy 565 pants
And another pair of Levi's Corduroy 565 pants
And Austin Powers Felicity Shagwell Action Figure
And Austin Powers Danger Action Figure Macfarlane Toys 1999
And a pair of Levi's 565 jeans
And another pair of Levi's 565 jeans
Credits
Episode One

Episode One

About “Patrick’s Chirstmas Poem [Untitled]” by Episode One

Read the complete lyrics to "Patrick’s Chirstmas Poem [Untitled]" by Episode One from the album "Christmas poems" in 2021. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Christmas, Poetry, Non-Music.

"Patrick’s Chirstmas Poem [Untitled]" is performed by Episode One. from the album "Christmas poems" in 2021 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Patrick’s Chirstmas Poem [Untitled]", explore more songs by Episode One using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Patrick’s Chirstmas Poem [Untitled]" is credited to Episode One. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Patrick’s Chirstmas Poem [Untitled]" appears on "Christmas poems" in 2021.

Visit the Episode One artist page at /artist/episode-one for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.