[Spoken]
I am Jim E. Brown
Welcome to my guided meditation
This meditation will provide you with peace of mind and rid you of the feelings of anxiety, shame, guilt, and other problems that commonly afflict us
Follow my instructions
Close your eyes
Rid your mind of all thoughts
If a thought pops through your head, imagine it as a cloud that's just having its way and traveling past, but not deserving of more thought or consideration than that
Relax
Relax
Wiggle your little toes
Wiggle your little toes
Relax and imagine a peaceful place
Beams of light encircle your head
You are traveling insidе the deepest reachеs of your consciousness
You are a baby again, before the cruel world had its way with you, before mum made you eat those disgusting peas
You're a pure beam of light, a pure beam of conscious energy
You've never had the grotesque taste of peas on your tongue
You've never been hurt by women
You've never been made fun of by little children just because you're different
When I was just five, I looked to be about nineteen or twenty
I suffer from various degenerative conditions
I am also an alcoholic, which further ages me
I was able to buy Belhaven Scottish Stout at the age of five
I'd drink it in the schoolyard, or behind the Tesco
Think about a time when someone didn't treat you nicely, like the little children making fun of you for looking to be an adult when you're just a baby boy
Go inside that feeling
Travel into it
Live inside that feeling
Feel the pain
Taste the peas on your tongue
Feel, but heal
Those feelings aren't real
They're just old little shits in the back of your head
Tell 'em to fuck off
Now imagine something nice, like the taste of a creamy dessert on your tongue
You're flying
You're flying
Live in this moment
Transcend the guilty feelings
You didn't do nothing wrong
You was just fucking off
Besides, all those little nasties in your mind are just that: little nasties
They have no bearing and no place
They have no place in your life now
My dad was a male model
He had pus filled boils on his face that ruined his modeling career
He took his own life when the pus filled boils appeared
I remember walking into his room one day
He was crying his eyes out and scratching the boils
On the floor there was a wet pile of tears, blood and pus
It's a painful memory for me, but I must live inside of this memory
I'm drowning in the pus and tears and blood
Oh, shit
I don't wanna be drowning in this fluid
I'm living in this negative feeling
But now, now I'm emerging from it
My spirit is dancing around in the clouds
There is sadness in life, but also positivity
I bounce around in transcendent happiness
I'm a big boy now
I don't need to eat peas
I can decide what I eat and what I drink
After I record this, I'll have a tall Belhaven Scottish Stout
Close your eyes
Keep 'em closed
You don't exist in your body
You're a beam of light
Light is energy
You are light
Float
Float, light, float
Give yourself to the universe
Make love to a cloud
See a dark rainbow
It looks like a piece of candy
I used to love candy as a boy
Mum said I couldn't eat too much of it
It would rot me teeth
Mildred was my ex
She died in a car crash
She used to eat peas just like mum
I hate the taste of peas
I was probably sexually attracted to Mildred 'cause she ate peas just like mum, and one is subconsciously or unconsciously attracted to their mum
But enough about me
Think about maybe a food that your mum made you eat, or something about your mum, or dad, that helped define the relationships you had in the future, or maybe the one you have now
Close your eyes and think about it
Hold on to the feeling or thought
Not much different between a thought and a feeling, is it?
It's all some baloney that happens inside ya chest, and sometimes in ya head
Think about the moment you was born
You come our your mum's vagina, covered in blood and fecal matter, or whatever that liquid is
Amniotic fluid?
But you're pure
The purity is overwhelming
Travel back there
Become the purity that you were at birth
The negativity that you experience and feel, it's all a construct
Think about the pure, beautiful ball of flesh you were when you came out your mum's vagina, before they told you how to act, before they forced peas down your gullet, before dad killed himself 'cause his male modeling career was over 'cause he had pus filled boils on his face, before all that
You was pure
You are love
Repeat after me: Love
L-O-V-E
And once more: L-O-V-E
And once more: L-O-V-E
You're floating in the infinite river of consciousness
Don't try to control it, just kinda float
Let the ripples and waves carry you
Listen to the sound of your heart beating
Can you hear it?
Lick your lips
You're not the trouble with society
You're a fucking baby
You're a pure beam of light
You're pure energy, plain and simple
Don't feel shitty
Don't feel like shit
Think about the most wonderful happiest thing that's ever happened to you
Live inside that feeling
Repeat after me: I am not shit
I am not shit
I am a pure beam of conscious energy
I don't have to eat peas anymore
I'm just like a little baby come right out my mum's vagina covered in blood
That's how pure I am
Repeat that
You are purity
You are love
You are not the negativity that constantly interrupts every positive thought you have
You are worthwhile
People like you
You've got a great head on your shoulders
Everyone wants to be your friend
You're cool
You've got a nice body, great thighs
Your face isn't funny looking
The coronavirus will not infect you
You're not weird or fucked up
You're really nice
Live inside these thoughts
Repeat them to yourself
Repeat this recording to yourself over and over again
We recommend listening to this recording five times per day
You will feel better
You will love
You will love
You are purity
You went inside of a painful feeling, but you came out stronger
You came out a beam of light
You are a little baby
You're coming back into yourself
You're loosening up
You're wiggling those little toes again
Your eyes are opening
Your eyes are opening
You are back in the world
You are happy and healthy
You are not shit
You are hot
You've got a great body
You are hot
You've got a great body
This is Jim E. Brown
You have now achieved spiritual enlightenment
Congratulations
