Lyrks
Lyrks
Lyrks
Cover Art

Everyone’s a Little Bit Racist Lyrics by John Tartaglia, Stephanie D’Abruzzo, Natalie Venetia Belcon, Jordan Gelber, Ann Harada

Avenue Q (Original Broadway Cast Recording)

2003

[Princeton]
Say, Kate, can I ask you a question?
[Kate]
Sure
[Princeton]
Well, you know Trekkie Monster upstairs?
[Kate]
Uh huh
[Princeton]
Well, he's Trekkie Monster, and you're Kate Monster
[Kate]
Right
[Princeton]
You're both Monsters
[Kate]
Yeah
[Princeton]
Are you two related?
[Kate]
What? Princeton! I'm surprised at you! I find that racist
[Princeton]
Oh, well, I'm sorry, I was just asking
[Kate]
Well, it's a touchy subject
No, not all monsters are related
What are you trying say, huh? That we all look the same to you?
Huh, huh, huh?
[Princeton]
No, no, no, oh, not at all
I'm sorry, I guess that was a little racist
[Kate]
I should say so
You should be much more careful when you're talking about the sensitive subject of race
[Princeton]
Well, look who's talking!
[Kate]
What do you mean?
[Princeton]
What about that special Monster school you told me about?
[Kate]
What about it?
[Princeton]
Well could someone like me go there?
[Kate]
No, we don't want people like you!
[Princeton]
Ha ha ha ha ha, you see? You're a little bit racist
[Kate]
Well, you're a little bit too
[Princeton]
I guess we're both a little bit racist
[Kate]
Admitting it is not an easy thing to do
[Princeton]
But I guess it's true
[Kate]
Between me and you
[Both]
I think everyone's a little bit racist sometimes
Doesn't mean we go around committing hate crimes
Look around and you will find
No one's really color blind
Maybe it's a fact we all should face
Everyone makes judgments based on race
[Princeton]
No, not big judgments, like who to hire or who to buy a newspaper from
[Kate]
No
[Princeton]
No, just little judgments like thinking that Mexican
Busboys should learn to speak goddamn English!
[Kate]
Right!
[Both]
Everyone's a little bit racist today
So, everyone's a little bit racist, okay
Ethnic jokes might be uncouth
But you laugh because they're based on truth
Don't take them as personal attacks
Everyone enjoys them, so relax!
[Princeton]
All right, stop me if you've heard this one
[Kate]
Okay!
[Princeton]
Alright there's a plane going down, and there's only one parachute, and there's a rabbi, a priest
[Kate]
And a black guy!
[Gary]
Whatchoo talkin' 'bout Kate?
[Kate]
Uh....
[Gary]
You were telling a black joke
[Princeton]
Well, sure, Gary, but lots of people tell black jokes
[Gary]
I don't!
[Princeton]
Well, of course you don't—you're black, but I bet you tell Polack jokes, right?
[Gary]
Well, sure I do, those stupid Polacks, ha ha ha
[Princeton]
Now, don't you think that's a little racist?
[Gary]
Well damn, I guess you're right
[Kate]
You're a little bit racist
[Gary]
Well, you're a little bit too
[Princeton]
We're all a little bit racist!
[Gary]
I think that I would have to agree with you
[Kate & Princeton]
We're glad you do
[Gary]
It's sad but true
Everyone's a little bit racist, all right
[Kate]
All right
[Princeton]
All right
[Gary]
All right
Bigotry has never been exclusively white
[All]
If we all could just admit
That we are racist a little bit
Even though we all know that it's wrong
Maybe it would help us get along
[Princeton]
Oh, Christ, do I feel good!
[Gary]
Now there was a fine upstanding black man
[Princeton]
Who?
[Gary]
Jesus Christ
[Kate]
But, Gary, Jesus was white
[Gary]
No, Jesus was black
[Kate]
No, Jesus was white
[Gary]
No, I'm pretty sure Jesus was black
[Princeton]
Guys, guys, Jesus was Jewish
[All]
*laughter*
[Brian]
Hey guys, what are you laughing about?
[Gary]
Racism
[Brian]
Cool
[Christmas Eve]
Brian, come back here! You take out lecycuraburs!
[Princeton]
What's that mean?
[Brian]
Um, recyclables
[Kate, Princeton and Gary]
*laughter*
[Brian]
Hey, don't laugh at her
How many languages do you speak?
[Kate]
Oh, come off it, Brian
Everyone's a little bit racist
[Brian]
I'm not!
[Princeton]
Oh no?
[Brian]
Nope!
[Princeton]
Huh
[Brian]
How many Oriental wives have you got?
[Christmas Eve]
What? Brian!
[Princeton]
Brian, buddy, where you been?
The term is Asian-American
[Christmas Eve]
I know you are no intending to be
But calling me Oriental—offensive to me!
[Brian]
I'm sorry, honey, I love you
[Christmas Eve]
And I love you
[Brian]
But you're racist, too
[Christmas Eve]
Yeah, I know
The Jews have all the money
And the whites have all the power
And I'm always in taxi cab
With driver who no shower
[Kate]
Me too
[Princeton and possibly Brian]
Me too
[Gary]
I can't even get a taxi!
[All]
Everyone's a little bit racist, it's true
But everyone is just about as racist as you
If we all could just admit
That we are racist a little bit
And everyone stopped being so PC
Maybe we could live in harmony
[Christmas Eve]
Evlyone's a ritter bit lacist
Credits
John Tartaglia

John Tartaglia

Stephanie D’Abruzzo

Stephanie D’Abruzzo

Natalie Venetia Belcon

Natalie Venetia Belcon

Jordan Gelber

Jordan Gelber

Ann Harada

Ann Harada

About “Everyone’s a Little Bit Racist” by John Tartaglia

Read the complete lyrics to "Everyone’s a Little Bit Racist" by John Tartaglia, Stephanie D’Abruzzo, Natalie Venetia Belcon, Jordan Gelber, Ann Harada from the album "Avenue Q (Original Broadway Cast Recording)" in 2003. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Soundtrack, Broadway, Comedy.

"Everyone’s a Little Bit Racist" is performed by John Tartaglia, Stephanie D’Abruzzo, Natalie Venetia Belcon, Jordan Gelber, Ann Harada. from the album "Avenue Q (Original Broadway Cast Recording)" in 2003 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Everyone’s a Little Bit Racist", explore more songs by John Tartaglia, Stephanie D’Abruzzo, Natalie Venetia Belcon, Jordan Gelber, Ann Harada using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

View all songs and biography for John Tartaglia · Trending lyrics · Billboard Hot 100

Frequently asked questions

"Everyone’s a Little Bit Racist" is credited to John Tartaglia, Stephanie D’Abruzzo, Natalie Venetia Belcon, Jordan Gelber, Ann Harada. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Everyone’s a Little Bit Racist" appears on "Avenue Q (Original Broadway Cast Recording)" in 2003.

Visit the John Tartaglia, Stephanie D’Abruzzo, Natalie Venetia Belcon, Jordan Gelber, Ann Harada artist page at /artist/john-tartaglia for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.