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Trapped in the Cupboard Lyrics by MadTV

2005

(Chapter 1)
[Verse: Jordan Peele as R. Kelly]
It's early in the mornin'
I'm just wakin' up
I got a rumble in my belly
I am R. Kelly
Voice calls out, "Hey, baby" My woman comes in the scene
I think, "Ooh, damn girl, I wish you were 13"
She says, "I fixed you eggs and bacon
For your mornin' wakin'."
She says, "I love you baby, last night I wasn't fakin'."
I say, "Hey listen up, I gots to keep it real
This food sure look good, but bitch, I want my cereal."
So I put on my clothes
I can't believe these ho's
Into the kitchen I goes
"Bitch, I need my Cheerios!"
And I'm so damn mad that I can hardly sing
I says "What?" She says "What?" I says "What?" She says "I didn't say anything."
I said, "You just wait here, I'll get it my own damn self
The box is just where I left it, it's on the middle shelf."
She asks, "What about your cinnamon bun?"
That's when I pull out my gun
"Something's goin' on in here, I'm gonna get to the bottom of this one!"
So I go to the cupboard
She says, "Don't go to the cupboard!"
I say, "Why? What's in the cupboard?"
"Who said anything about the cupboard?"
"You're standing in front of the cupboard!"
"Oh, is this the cupboard?"
"Girl, you know that's the cupboard!"
And that's when I open the cupboard
And my box was empty...(empty...empty...empty...)
(Chapter 34)
Well, here I am at the grocery store
I got my Cheerios and some milk to pour
"I usually get 2 percent, but now I'm gonna try soy
I need my proteins, I am a growing boy."
The woman in front of me got all these coupons
I said, "Bitch, do you really need five cents off that Grey Poupon?"
The cashier says, "Hey aren't you--?" I say, "Yes, keep it down."
He says, "MC Hammer!" I say, "I'll bust you in your f---- mouth."
He says, "Chill out, man. There's no price in my hand
I gotta do a price check, and I know, Mr. Hammer, you'll understand."
I said, "The two for one? What's wrong with this place?
Should we handle this the Christian way? I'll shoot you in your f---- face!"
Then he looked at me
And he screamed "Security!"
I said, "Oh brother, please! Cereal is all I need!
See, I went to my cupboard..."
He said, "Don't start with the cupboard!"
I said, "You shoulda seen my cupboard!"
He said, "I don't have time for all that, I'm a grocery store clerk, not your therapist!"
So I called up my lady
Said "I'm comin' home, baby."
She said, "Do you miss me?"
Then I heard the Rice Krispies...(Krispies...Krispies...Krispies...Krispies...)
(Chapter 189)
So I'm drivin' home, I just can't understand
She didn't buy my Cheerios, she bought her own brand
I'm about to go O.J. Y'all know what I mean
I raced home in a prop car in front of a green screen
I bust in the house. She says, "I know what you're thinking
That snap crackle pop you heard was Pop Rocks and Coke that I'm drinking."
"Ho!"
That's all I could say was "Ho"
"Tell me ho, then what the f--- are those Krispies crumbs doin' in this bowl?"
I said, "That's it, I'm gonna end this video."
And then the door bust down and in busts the po-po
I said, "Hey officer, what's the problem you beep-hole?"
"He cited three times today I pulled my gun on innocent people"
I made a dash for the cupboard
Tried to hide in the cupboard
He pulled me out of the cupboard
I said, "Officer, you can't take me away because I have six more of these videos to make to complete my urban opera!"
So here we are now at the end of the story
And I'm goin' to jail, this time not for statutory...(tory...tory...tory...tory...)
Credits
MadTV

MadTV

About “Trapped in the Cupboard” by MadTV

Read the complete lyrics to "Trapped in the Cupboard" by MadTV in 2005. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under In English, USA, Opera.

"Trapped in the Cupboard" is performed by MadTV. in 2005 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Trapped in the Cupboard", explore more songs by MadTV using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Trapped in the Cupboard" is credited to MadTV. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

Album information for "Trapped in the Cupboard" is not available in our database yet. You can still read the full lyrics on this page.

Visit the MadTV artist page at /artist/madtv for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.