[Intro - Sam Reich, Mettaton]
Get ready for a rap battle! Tonight's guests:
The most hot robot, it's Mettaton! Oh yes...
And his partner in rhyme, me! I've been here the whole time
[Verse 1 - Sam Reich]
This is Game Changer, the only show that changes every show
My name is Sam Reich, and I'm your dope-flowing host
Normally I'd say I'm joined by a lovely contestant
But not even FixItMan could unbreak this invention
Now, I'd ask you if you know how the game works, but I'm sure
That you barely understand all the mechanics of yours
And to win, you've got to learn how to spit a good burn
So, first prompt on the board, Salmon Says it's your turn
[Verse 2 - Mettaton]
I'm glad you took somе time off making TikToks on your phone
To attend Mеttaton's Underground Cooking Show!
A couple of rhymes with some lines, mix them up on this track and
It's the first thing Sam can enjoy with no allergic reaction
Over on to Quiz Show, your question (Make the right choice!)
Who treats comedians who are living check-to-check as toys?
Correct answer is Sam! That's a shock, is it not?
His care for his cast is smaller than the darn parking lot!
Go ahead and add this match to your list of regrets!
Like those college girl videos and the thumbnail breasts
My, my, one verse in, and you're already down for the count
Perhaps make like your parent company and... Dropout :D
[Verse 3 - Sam Reich, Josh Ruben Zac Oyama, Brennan Lee Mulligan]
Ooo, sorry I didn't say Sam Says, gotta listen closely
That's a point away, seems your chance of winning is ghostly
Now it's time for a minigame, so I'm gonna pass it off
Your opponent: The Noise Boys! Starting with Josh
No problem, I'm flipping both the script and the bird (Caw!)
Of course a loveless robot came from that awkward nerd
This machine is a hack, I spat on the track... and my name is Zac
You'd think a murderous robot would have no trouble killing kids
But despite your task's simplicity, you cannot win!
Introduced as a star but can't be your game's biggest villain
I've done what you couldn't! Yeah, you killed him
[Verse 4 - Mettaton, Sam Reich]
We interrupt this trashfire with MTT Breaking News!
Reports are saying "Sam's persona is a complete ruse"?
Dropout America is claiming "Those wokes are done"
This square's got you crumbling, Reich- where are you from?
Here's a live comment from Sam, The Absolute Villain:
Despite what Brennan said, Dropout supports killing children?
Grant, I swear- Just another of his victims
Expected from the son of a man who worked under Clinton
[Verse 5 - Sam Reich]
Can't keep eyes on your forever, now your ratings will plummet
Even Zam Says it's sad you were replaced with a puppet
Do you need a Grant appearance? Your viewership is tragic
But to bring back the audience, it's time for some magic
Your musical makes less sense than a mountain by a coast
And I like you like I like my time travellers: I don't
So I'll give you one chance to home run off your pitch
Ash, would you please... flip the switch
[Verse 6 - Mettaton NEO]
Yes, this new form will bring in some traction
With light, camera, drama, bloodshed and action!
I had that whole stage rigged with explosives and yet
This comedian still was the biggest bomb on my set
I'm flawless and lawless when I'm on the stage
Be honest, Sam, whose lines did you rip off anyway?
You'll be forgotten, left to rot, like a poorer Quibi
Six dollars a month, Sam? I did this for free!
Your airtime is up, Reich, the streaming bubble's popping
I've canned you, darling, and now that's showstopping
[Outro - Sam Reich]
That does it for us here at Game Changer. I am your host, Sam Reich, reminding you that... sometimes it isn't about who won, or who's next, it's about... who asked? Good night
