Was i ever truly here did i ever interfere, did i ever make a difference would you really even care was i there on all those dates did u ever lend an ear social skills are fucked up locked in my room for a year
May my death be as pretty as my art display
The remains of a gritty broken heart decay what do i have to show for my life dismay feels collect rеdirect frontal cortex goes grеy
All i do is live want to try and make a life for my kids for my friends for my mum for my wife for the pressure on my shoulders two towers i'm on the line i don’t care but the hair or the hoes or the hyms
If i was gone tomorrow then what would you tell me now, reflect on cherished days or would you sit there with a frown, would you tell me it's okay there's no worry’s settle down, or would you take one last chance to go and throw me to the ground, remind me of mistakes, remarks and shit i say, show me ur depiction of how you see me day to day, at least be fuckin honest i don't admit it but i care, providing me with evidence that i truly was here
I'm sorry i grew up to be the son you didn't want, i'm sorry my anxiety left you there to rot man i'm sorry you shared feelings and i didn't give it thought i'm sorry things i said really left you with distraught
I’m sorry we didn’t fuck i'm sorry we didn’t love im sorry that i cared i'm sorry we lost the spark i'm sorry i didn't try other ways to show you lust, my head been in the clouds i’m finding my way above
Was i ever truly here did i ever interfere, did i ever make a difference would u really even care
Why would you care bout my opinion you can't make one up yourself we have a constant need to feel we're heard by everybody else, we project our plots and prayers piss you off you feel the pelts, pretend those people care those words hit fall off and melt
Is closure about finding answers or finding inner peace cause iv kept these things that haunt me to myself and under sheets, i don't confront the problem i cut off the peoples needs how can i care bout you when i don't even care bout me, my purpose reasons spawning here are slowly disapating, hypercontriac behaviour bends the way im looking daily , it took the nineteen years to become the man i am but what good is all the chiseling if this marbles not for fans, to get human approval proves to me that i'm more than, but when the doors are locked and close no one knows where i fuckin stand
Worry bout all the things i seem to dream ain't worth talkin bout keen to keep ‘em in a vault and never let them out, all these things r piling up around can't seem to make my way from north to south
Son you need to come back home, you've been lost out at sea and it has been far too long, i know those 4 years tuff and it broke you to the bone, i know that you've gone numb and you don't know where to go, i feel your pain and anguish all that built up inner rage, i pray that you forgive and you see another day, the nights you drunk yourself to sleep eyes pouring out with rain, i hope it built the character u can go on to relay
Cause i knew you were stuck, i know you were fucked, i know bout the knifes suicide and the cuts, i saw the hopeless nights and i really wish you luck cause this life it really needs you or maybe just your art
Ready to die ready to fly ready to rot ready to sigh ready to give everything that i have ready to make into a new life did i pass right through these years was i ever truly here or was i always bound to be behind 4 windows and a chair
