[Intro]
Hey, yo!
A lot of you are probably wondering why each verse goes off on random tangents
I never wondered that
But that's just what it's like in my head, man
You try living like that every second of every day
So now, I'm releasing all of these crazy thoughts out into the world
You deal with it
[Verse 1]
My name is [Censored] and I'm here to say
Fuck any rapper alive who starts their rap that way
Including me, indubitably
I poo and pee, so juvenile-y
On the ones and twos
When I drop a deuce
I tend to do so in twos and threes
That's how you would be
If you were me
The fallacy and mass hypocrisy
Makes it impossible to give A shit about the general P
P-probably, how could I possibly
Be the real me when they just won’t let me be
Or let me embrace my psychopathy
They just keep taking away all the things I enjoy
Then ask me why I think so negatively
I’m positive you’re all fucking annoyed
You can’t avoid the noid or fill the void
From the hole my pole would leave in your loins
'Cause of the haphazard way I play with your groins
So, bitch, quit toying with me
I spit this shit so effortlessly
I love it when a girl is tall and busty
So I can call her Pringles ‘cause I love a stacked snack
If I got anymore laid back during your rack attack
Then your ass crack slapping my ball sack
Would have to start cumming to me
Boppity boopy, now do you see
I'm only suitable to open up a charcuterie (Salami for sale)
During a jubilee (To all the girls I loved)
Resistance is futile-y
Hey, who just farted, was that you or me
Well, I am technically a rapper, though
Sometimes it be like that
Only take shit when I’m on the crapper so
I’ll be right back
[Chorus]
I keep saying stupid offensive shit like I'm trying to get famous
But notice I don't really give a shit if you know what my name is
I'm just trying to work through some shit, what you hear is the tamest
So you buttfucks can slowly eat my shit if you think that it's heinous
Eat shit
Eat my shit
Straight from my anus
[Verse 2]
Hi, hello, I just thought you should know
I don’t rap to a beat, I just go with the flow
My favourite snack is a beautiful girl
My second favourite are ho hoes
When she spreads out her wings and begins to unfurl
I call her the Pokemon, Ho-oh
Hi ho
Ho, ho, ho
Hello ho (hey hey)
Would you dumb fucks like me better if I rap that way
Monosyllabic, no, I won’t have it
Fuck a nun, I’ve already gotten into the habit
Dagnabit, I can’t shoot and I can’t stab it
But it’s so close, I can almost grab it
I don’t punch lines, I just tend to jab it
I can only be myself, like Dick Cavett
So hip hop, I’m Bunny Rabbit
I’m a big dog, and I’m going rabid
Since ‘21, I’ve been a savage
So black panther, you should call me Ravage
Yo, isn’t he a jaguar?
Um, actually, he’s been both
WaKenda 4Ever
Whoa, whoa, whoa
I immediately apologize to Black Panthers, Egyptians, West Africans
And anyone who needs to use ASL for that bit of cultural appropriation
I don’t accept your apology
Look, I know it’s not exactly appropriate but–
If you know, then don’t do it
–What’s all your hotties’ age, sex and location
He did it
Don’t mean to be a sex pest
Just said that last bit in jest
So if it’s hard for you to ingest
I suggest you probably live less
Die, motherfucker, die!
It might comfort you to know this
My whole life has been loveless
It’s difficult to be soulless
Dick soft ‘cause I’ve been stressed
Guess you could say that I’m boneless
Poor guy’s been bloodless
Just one night, if you could blow this
After a sneeze is the only time I’ve been blessed
I need to drown my sorrows in breasts
Chest exposed to get me to invest
I just want to see her thickness in a thin dress
Makes it hard not to be impressed
I love it when her clothes are the simplest
So I can take her many holes and just pinterest
Can’t wait to fall into my very own temptress
But I still wait to be invited like a vampire
Before I move forward with my ingress
Grr, Argh
[Chorus]
I keep saying stupid offensive shit like I'm trying to get famous
But notice I don't really give a shit if you know what my name is
I'm just trying to work through some shit, what you hear is the tamest
So you buttfucks can slowly eat my shit if you think that it's heinous
Eat shit
Eat my shit
Straight from my anus
[Bridge]
Give it all I got to hit the spot
If I see you’re streaming, I wave to the tidal
Rip through this THOT to take my shot
So long as I don’t pierce nothing vital
With this rap, I'm a chunk-a gold surrounded by booby traps
I'm your newest idol
Smoking joints, the Robin Williams of jumping off points
So much hang time, I'm suicidal
No, seriously, I’m suicidal
Die, motherfucker, die
[Verse 3]
From the day that I saw '8 Mile'
I always knew I wanted to rap
Anger and pain inside so vile
I started chewing the fat
From the moment I spit, I just spewed bile
Never giving a crap
Holy shit, that's so juvenile
Swear words, I'm all about that
Fuck, shit, ass, bitch, cunt, shooby-de-doo-wop
Oh my God, I can't believe he said the SDDW-word
I'm scared
Just stayed up in my room, like a loon
Combined the boom and the bap
Then changed my whole tune just as soon
As these fucking buffoons started setting a trap
Shit, it’s a fucking trap!
Wrapped in a cocoon, so you probably assume
A butterfly is coming straight outta that
But drop the harpoon or you'll get buried in tombs
‘Cause I’m shooting straight for the moon
While your girl's head is already down on my lap
If I ain't kissing her butt, I’m licking her crack
If I don’t do what she want, she gives me a smack
If I ain’t flooding her cunt, I'm digging the fact
How do I put this blunt, no need for anal, bum
My mind only has one track (Vaginal!)
I don't say anymore than I have to, if that
You repeat the same shit 'cause you have to, GIF cat
It’s giffy cat, jiffy cat
Want my advice? I pleasure twice before I fuck once
If I like the way that she dip that
Your body's looking real nice, Old Spice
Can you introduce my dick to your lip fat
