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Bought a Monkey Lyrics by Trevor Moore

High In Church

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Bought a monkey
Bought a monkey, bought a monkey
Bought a monkey
Bought a monkey, bought a monkey
Bought a monkey
Bought a monkey, bought a monkey
You see me coming, motherfucker, better run from me
[Verse 1]
Back in school everyone
Used to make fun of me
I ate my lunch by myself
And never went to parties
Jocks would push me around
Girls would all call me names
But I kept my mind on my paper
And my head in the game
Workin' three jobs at a time
And sockin' money away
While they all went to college
Just to get drunk and get laid
Years later, and I finally
Reached my goal with my funds
And everyone who bullied me
Is gonna see what I've done
[Chorus]
Bought a monkey
Bought a monkey, bought a monkey
Bought a monkey
Bought a monkey, bought a monkey
Bought a monkey
Bought a monkey, bought a monkey
You see me coming, motherfucker, better run from
[Verse 2]
This monkey's hard as shit
Bought him online from a zoo
So he's crazy as hell
'Cause he was probably abused
He likes to smoke cigarettes
And looks good in headbands
I also tied nunchucks
To each one of his hands
And a knife to his head
A skateboard to his feet
Everyone who picked on me
Gon' run when we hit the streets
So wherever you at
You better run and hide
'Cause you finna be the victim
Of a monkey drive by
[Verse 3]
Then we'll go to the clubs
And find Becky LaRue
She was the prettiest girl
In my entire school
Then she'll be dancing with Brian
From the lacrosse team
But they gonna stop when they get a load of
Monkey and me
'Cause Monkey's wearin' a suit
And we both look cool as hell
Then an hour later we're tag teaming Becky
At the hotel
Brian's watching us go
And he's gettin' real sad
'Cause Becky tells him me and Monkey
Are the best that she's had
And she gets pregnant real fast
'Cause our sperm count's insane
Then gives birth to a half-monkey
With a human brain
His genetics are fucked
And he can hardly see
But he's cute and says funny things
Like "Please kill me"
So we sell him to science
For a trillion in cash
Then withdraw it all
And make the dumb economy crash
Everyone's poor as shit
And we're both rich as hell
Everyone from high school
Is locked up in a cell
Then we go to the moon
And we meet moon babes
They each have like 6 boobs
And like 15 labes
[Spoken, Sam Brown]
Hey, weirdo. The zoo's closed, you gotta go
[Trevor Moore]
How much is it to buy one of these things?
[SB]
I've told you before, you can't own a monkey in this state
[TM]
But I have almost one thousand and a hundred dollars
[SB]
Doesn't matter, now get out
[TM]
Okay. Just so you know, you're on the list now
[SB]
Alright, we're all on the list, okay? Go!
[Sung]
Bought a monkey
Bought a monkey, bought a monkey
Credits
Trevor Moore

Trevor Moore

About “Bought a Monkey” by Trevor Moore

Read the complete lyrics to "Bought a Monkey" by Trevor Moore from the album "High In Church". On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Rap.

"Bought a Monkey" is performed by Trevor Moore. from the album "High In Church" This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Bought a Monkey", explore more songs by Trevor Moore using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Bought a Monkey" is credited to Trevor Moore. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Bought a Monkey" appears on "High In Church".

Visit the Trevor Moore artist page at /artist/trevor-moore for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.