[Intro: Narrator]
This is an intermission track and an absolute skip. Prepare yourself for HOT FUCKING TRASH
[Chorus: Hywel Playz]
Potato
Potato
[Fact: Hywel Playz]
Po-ta-to. A potato is a starchy plant tuber, which is one of the most important food crops, cooked and eaten as a vegetable. You know what a potato is, right? (right? right? right? right?...)
[Spoken Word: Alex]
When you paused it, I still heard Hywel's voice when you paused it... haha- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
(Are you okay?)
I don't remember
[Pre-Verse: Sammy]
I say uhh...
S- hold on. yea- So far we got the- Mayonnaise, Bell Pepper, Avocado, Tomato, and the Cucumber, yuh
Cu- cu- now- now... Now we add in the potato
It isn't a tomato, Texas has torna- okay just drop it- I'm going back to the kitchen
[Verse 1: Michael]
He's been plotting on this salad for like seven days
Caught in his emotions, hoping for heaven's praise
(Bite this mixing sucks) (It only gets worse)
But every time we come around and say it's tasteless
He screams at us and says our argument is baseless
(Potato) The first time, he was kind of confused
Second time around, he was just unamused
But when the third time came, I saw something was wrong
And by the sixth over a month ago he couldn't stay strong
I saw him in the basement, quietly crying
(Potato) I didn't know it hurt him so much and how hard he was trying
I guess I also shed a tear
Then ran back to the kitchen so he didn't see me near
Told Hywel what I saw he didn't understand
Said (It's not our fault the fucking salad is canned)
I replied, be mindful, his feelings are more fragile than playdough
Doesn’t matter if you hate it just hold on to the potato (POTATO!)
Put a smile on when he’s back, in the meanwhile think of this
The potato that you’re holding is the key to human bliss
Cause we made so many products and created so much goods
That we know to use potatoes for some things that aren’t food
Like a battery, powering machines with electricity
Take them to the kitchen and they’re used in eccentricity
Put them in a bowl and start to mash their fucking guts out
(Does it matter when this salad makes me want to rip my nuts out?)
If you deep fry a potato then you got yourself some fries
Cook them in the oven you can make yourself a pie
Fill a plastic bag up, DIY your lays
(I will walk out of this house if you say another phrase)
Okay Alex, since you think you’re so fucking smart
How about you tell me what type of potato fills up your heart?
(I’d probably have to say the ones that are sweet)
This comes from the same guy who has a crippling addiction to feet
(Okay dude I DON’T CARE!) You're mad... you're mad...
(This salad freaking SUCKS dude I hope that you’re aware) (I'd rather be skinned alive than eat this)
(You’re just glazing over Sammy cause you’re mentally retarded
If you take another bite I bet your liver gets discarded)
Okay! Watch me! (Yeah I’m watching!)
(...Are you gonna eat it?!)
I’m gonna eat just give me a sec
(This potato is inedible)
Nope, it’s not I just need me a minute
Oh shit- (This pota-)
[Outro: Michael]
An hour later found myself in the E.R
With Sammy waiting for me and my colon in a jar
Everything before me waking up is in a blur, but
One thing I remember is this salad left a scar
Sammy is inviting us again around tonight
Telling us that this time, the salad is alright
Now I'm sure to- if to come, and try and eat another spud
(Potato, potato) Cause I might just find myself lying in vomit shit and blood
[Outro 2: Mervin]
(Now, people usually pair potatoes with... Onions.... But we, have a different... Opinion)
(Now, people usually pair potatoes with... Onions....)
