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Not Too Long, Not Too Hard Lyrics by Rudy Ray Moore

Eat Out More Often

0

[Intro]
(Oh shit)
And now ladies and gentlemen, I bring you the body
[Verse]
Great day in the morning an' she sho'
Know what to say, the body
You know girls I look like Atlas with no clothes on
Can you dig it?
Hoo! My, my, my, my
Woman cross your legs
Good God o'mighty
That chick sitting over there in that
Green is built like a big shit house
Hoo! You know I’d sho' like to get in your pants
(Why?)
‘Cause I done shit in mine
I’m not lying
You know I ask a young lady the other night in a night club
I said, “Young lady. Do you have a cherry?”
She said, “Hell yes. I got a cherry
But it’s been pushed back so damn far
you can use it for a tail light”
Yeah, in this same club, let me tell you what happened
It is a fellow went in the lady’s restroom by mistake
So he went in there and he pulled it out
He was shaking it like that
And all at once a lady come in and saw him
She said, “Ahh, ahh, ahh!"
Said "This is for ladies! This is for ladies!”
He said, “What the hell you think this is for?”
I wouldn’t lie to you baby
A friend of mine let his wife go out the other night
He said, “Baby” said “I want you to go down there and watch that Rudy Ray Moore tell all them lil ol' dirty stories"
Said "But I want you back in this house
by two o'clock in the morning”
Sho' nuff, she went out, she stayed out all night long
Daddy was sitting up with the little boy
and he didn’t ask momma no questions
When she walked through the door
He knocked her down
She started hollering, “Aww, daddy"
Said "Oh, please", said "Don’t hit me no more!”
Said “I was only out trucking daddy”
Little boy said daddy knocked momma down three mo' times
‘Cause you know damn well she can talk plainer than that
I wouldn’t lie baby.
I thought… you know, I like to talk
About things that once happened to me
In the course of a lifetime
There’s a lot things that really happened
Now, you take, um
I went to school, all the way through school
Right out the front door to the back
That’s right
We got a little girl in class
She could spell everything
Teacher said, “Sally Today" said "For your spelling lesson
I want you to spell Peter”
Sally said, “Teacher I can’t spell them old long
hard words like Peter, but I’ll try”
She say, “P-P-P”
Teacher said "Sit down gal
You gone stand up here and piss all day"
We had a little girl in the class, Maryann
She was the smartest baby
She said, “Teacher, teacher, teacher, I can spell it
P-E-T-E-R, Peter, Peter, Peter
They don’t come to hard and long for me baby”
I wouldn’t lie baby
Credits
Rudy Ray Moore

Rudy Ray Moore

About “Not Too Long, Not Too Hard” by Rudy Ray Moore

Read the complete lyrics to "Not Too Long, Not Too Hard" by Rudy Ray Moore from the album "Eat Out More Often". On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Comedy, Non-Music.

"Not Too Long, Not Too Hard" is performed by Rudy Ray Moore. from the album "Eat Out More Often" This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Not Too Long, Not Too Hard", explore more songs by Rudy Ray Moore using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Not Too Long, Not Too Hard" is credited to Rudy Ray Moore. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Not Too Long, Not Too Hard" appears on "Eat Out More Often".

Visit the Rudy Ray Moore artist page at /artist/rudy-ray-moore for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.