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Shaving too Lyrics by Mitch Hedberg

Strategic Grill Locations

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I have an underwater camera just in case I crash my car into a river, and at the last minute I see a photo opportunity of a fish that I have never seen
One time, this guy handed me a picture of him, he said,"Here's a picture of me when I was younger." Every picture is of you when you were younger. "Here's a picture of me when I'm older." "You son-of-a-bitch! How'd you pull that off? Lemme see that camera... what's it look like? "
I got a roommate. I live in New York City. I got roommate to save money. But, see, I fucked up cuz I'm 31 and I'm too old for a roommate. I fucked up severely. I signed a year lease, too. I really fucked up. It's like I wrote a joke that didn't work, but now I have to tell it for a year. My roommate says, "I need to shave and use the shower. Does anyone need to use the bathroom?" It's like some weird-ass quiz where he reveals the answer first
Every time I go and shave, I assume there's someone else on the planet shaving. So I say, 'I'm gonna go shave, too.'
Sometimes I wave to people I don't know. It's very dangerous to wave to someone you don't know because, what if they don't have a hand? They'll think you're cocky. "Look what I got motherfucker! This thing is useful. I'm gonna go pick something up!"
I drank some boiling water... cause I wanted to whistle...
If you lost your wallet, it's hard to dance. Hey I just lost my wallet but, hey this song is funky... fuck it... that shit's no good... this is a cd called "hit and miss"...
I got a robe... it's not a robe really it's just a towel that fits me
My sister wanted to be an actress. She never made it, but she does live in a trailer... so she got halfway. She's an actress, she's just never called to the set
On a traffic light green means 'go' and yellow means 'yield', but on a banana it's just the opposite. Green means 'hold on,' yellow means 'go ahead,' and red means, 'where the fuck did you get that banana at?'
Credits
Mitch Hedberg

Mitch Hedberg

About “Shaving too” by Mitch Hedberg

Read the complete lyrics to "Shaving too" by Mitch Hedberg from the album "Strategic Grill Locations". On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Pop.

"Shaving too" is performed by Mitch Hedberg. from the album "Strategic Grill Locations" This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Shaving too", explore more songs by Mitch Hedberg using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Shaving too" is credited to Mitch Hedberg. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Shaving too" appears on "Strategic Grill Locations".

Visit the Mitch Hedberg artist page at /artist/mitch-hedberg for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.